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On Reasons Why Everyone is Engaged But Me: A Sampling

Um, you guys all need to put money in the self-deprecation jar big time. We're going to have enough money in there to throw a giant party where we all cut our hair short, eat a ton (the correct amount) of cheese, and come up with other hobbies other than hoping someone will get engaged to us while we sit passively by not accessorizing.

Posted on March 11, 2014 at 1:21 pm 0

On Win a Jim Behrle Valentine

I left a dozen yellow/orange roses on my mom's porch last night. When she found them she texted me "yeeeeeeeee!!!!" I love her.

Posted on February 14, 2013 at 10:41 am 0

On Can We Still Be Friends?

@temporal_paradox Saddest ever. I'm in a similar spot. Worst. I recommend Jewel's "Foolish Games"

Posted on October 24, 2012 at 3:04 pm 1

On On Wearing Running Shoes (All the Time)

Oh NO! I urge the Hairpin to redact the last two paragraphs! Do it for the greater good!

Posted on August 1, 2012 at 4:38 pm 4

On The League of Ordinary Ladies: Code Name Dolphin Capricorn

I hate hate HATE when people say "do you know where the bathroom is?" when we're at places neither of us have ever been, and it's a normal setting like a bar/restaurant/mall I'm just like OBVIOUSLY JUST WALK TOWARD THE BACK/CORNER/DOORWAYS/NEXT TO THE KITCHEN! Props for knowing where bathrooms are.

Posted on July 2, 2012 at 4:21 pm 2

On A Better Book Club

Seattle 'Pinners have been book-clubbing some. We're gaining steam. Also, one of our books was a sci-fi/historical fiction/romance novel. So yeah, we're having fun.

Posted on June 27, 2012 at 2:32 pm 0

On I Went to a Beauty Convention and All I Got Was This Lousy Blog Post

@dotcommie Um 2012 is the Year of the Eyebrow. I can't get mine to be anywhere near as amazing as hers, but still, I'm working hard.

Posted on June 12, 2012 at 2:34 pm 1

On Ask a Clean Person: Let's All Make... Our Beds

@alphabiddycity Definitely also forgot this morning. Getting home at 11pm, making bed, then getting in bed. It counts.

Posted on March 1, 2012 at 3:46 pm 1

On Holiday Gift Take-Backs

I just got broken up with kinda recently. I went to his place when I knew he wouldn't be there and left him his stuff from my place (all personal care items I bought for him to keep at my place so he would be comfortable there and his STUPID Lord of the Rings DVDs) and took back all my stuff that was on loan (weirdly pretty much all clothing that he had borrowed: my 8th grade basketball jersey, fire department t shirt that lots of girls hit on him when he's wearing, a pair of boxers I stole from another ex [where did he think I got them]) I left all the gifts though, all the stupid art stuff I made him, etc. and I hope his heart wrenches every time he sees it. We are still probably getting back together, right guys?

Posted on December 27, 2011 at 3:28 pm 0

On Look at These Pictures of My Pets!

Not to be a downder on your birthday, but do you think your 14.5 year old dog might be whining about tangible discomfort along with his angst? Sometimes an old dog needs an NSAID to enjoy life.

Posted on September 2, 2011 at 1:17 pm 2