Woah-ho there, part of the answer to LW3 is kind of harsh: "Frankly, I'm not sure you maintaining a relationship with your parents is actually for the best right now, because it tells them that you're willing to put up with their transphobia and misgendering of your partner, and thus that their hurtful words and actions have no real consequences."
Why not recommend that LW3 send over some articles and have some open conversations with them? The parents are clearly uncomfortable and need a lot of guidance. I'm assuming they would even be too uncomfortable to Google this topic, and to be honest, I doubt they'd know what to look for.
I wholeheartedly disagree with forfeiting (even temporarily) one's relationship with their parents. It's not like one day they'll wake up and say "okay okay we love you both, come back!" Instead they'll think the worst, and it'll fester, they'll blame your S.O. and hate them MORE, and your negative energy will fester, and it'll be 10x worse in a year. I'm obvs not a therapist, but I would think the best thing to do would be to be honest, and say things like "your words and actions are hurtful because it makes me feel X; here is how you should refer to X" etc.
Even by trying to hash it out with them, it should at least show that you are an adult capable of caring for yourself and having responsible relationships, which will in turn allow them to trust you and trust your choice in people.
I'm going to go ahead and defend the person who asked the weight loss question and the author for selecting/answering it.
But first some caveats/recognition:
1. Yes, we absolutely live in a fat-phobic, fat shaming society.
2. This same society values thinness above all things regardless of physical health.
3. For people with body image/weight issues this is a particularly sensitive subject and the discussion of weight and weight loss can be triggering.
I respect and recognize all these things. HOWEVER.
If someone wants to lose weight in a healthy way that is meaningful to them, let them lose weight. Yes, they could be motivated by truly unreasonable beauty standards or could be doing it for purely superficial reasons but no one should be unhappy with their body for any reason. And no one should have to accept one body type over another for themselves simply because it's a more radical act. As long as you are healthy, you do you. Don't preach, don't judge, don't be a jerk and you'll be fine.
@Alli525 Where would one find these alleged "fleece-lined leggings"?
@questingbeast Hahaha I was reading Florence's comment thinking "should I disclose my gangbang fantasy?". And there you were! Yeah, I fantasize about degrading gangbangs that I'm 99.9% sure I would really hate in real life.
By questingbeast on Boy-Crazy But Curious, Dating While Disabled, and Introducing Parents to Your "New Norm"
@Florence Thinking about stuff you're not doing in real life seems to me like the whole POINT of fantasy-time. For me, it's all gangbangs, which I couldn't even begin to be bothered to do in real life. (Seems like there'd be a lot of admin.)
By Florence on Boy-Crazy But Curious, Dating While Disabled, and Introducing Parents to Your "New Norm"
A Queer Chick's advice to is amazing and wonderful as always, but I would also add to LW1 that sometimes there really is an unexplainable gap between what you actually are into and what you fantasize about. And that's ok and not weird and doesn't mean you're closeted! (I mean, you MIGHT be, and that's cool, too). I say this as a certified lesbian who sometimes fantasizes about men, but finds sleeping with them pretty damn unappealing.
Also, I think as you get more sexual experience, your fantasy life/real sex life start to sync up a bit-- when you're just starting to explore your sexuality you don't have many created memories to extrapolate from, and you don't actually have real-time feedback about what makes you feel good with another person, so you sometimes default to generalized erotic situations. That is my amateur assessment based on my own experience, anyway.
IS THIS WHAT I GET FOR NOT BEING GROSSED OUT BY THE TRYPOPHOBIA POST YESTERDAY?!?!?!?!
@harebell I was ready to stand by that comment, thinking she was 18 for some reason (which to me is a "little girl" - I mean, I think of myself at that age and realize how much of the world I truly did not even begin to grasp or understand), but the internet tells me she is 20. So I will amend that to "young woman." It honestly wasn't meant to demean or dismiss her, simply a comment on how young she really is, which helps to explain her behavior, I think.
Well, an article about Miley's crotch-grabbing antics is as good a place as any to post an update from the Friday Open Thread...
I posted that I was going to have a second round of images and an ultrasound done on my left breast. Good news, I guess - the lump over which they were concerned is very likely benign. Due to its uniform shape and size, they aren't too worried about it and told me I will need to come in every 6 months for 2 years to have it monitored to be sure it doesn't grow or alter its shape.
I'd rather they said it was someone's thumb over the lens, but I'll take what I can get.
Thanks to those 'Pinners who sent positive vibes my way - this is the best site with the greatest community and most intelligent comments.