This reminds me of that line from Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen (remember that one!):
Don’t worry about the future
Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.
The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind.
The kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
@Neptune You can't fool me. You still have laying options (sounds like multiple ones!). Leave us untouched something for ourselves!
@Statham That's exactly why we need one because we can't answer all the questions ourselves (obviously)! What about my burning questions about whether paying for porn is ever worth it? Or if your vagina is actually capable of yawning from boredom? What do I wear to the corner store to pick up another pint of Ben&Jerry's if my outside sweatpants have a stain from the first pint of Ben&Jerry's??
When are we getting "Ask a Single Girl Who Spends Her Nights and Weekend Watching Netflix in Her Messy Studio Apartment"??? Why does The Hairpin insist that everyone is getting uber-laid but me?!
Awww this both delights and saddens me. I've always felt like I have that same expressive great love within me, but have never found someone who allows (inspires?) me to share it. I think that's why we eat stuff like this up though. The older you get the more it seems truly GREAT love is a privilege few will be granted. If you stumble upon it, even witnessing someone else's, it's like gazing on a unicorn! Whoops! Now I've depressed myself.
Aww, I love people who look a gift horse in the mouth...and then promptly spit in it. I'm sorry, not "love". Hate. Now if you excuse me I'm off to get a haircut that I can come home and show to nobody.
LW1: I was you. Always falling for "friends" (usually these dudes are not actual friends and know full well how into them you are), not much relationship experience, a commitaphobe...Then one day I went to a therapist and she helpfully pointed out that traits one and two are strongly related to trait three. After spending a year working out WHY I was phobic of relationships, I suddenly was way less interested in dudes who jerked my feelings around. Because honestly LW, this dude knows you've been into him for forever and is hoping to capitalize on your emotions (not his own) to get what he wants (which is a wet dick and plausible deniability, also known as, pleading the drunk).
@Rosemary McClure Yeah, I didn't get that either. We often forget how small the world is, until it brings us uncomfortably face-to-face with our exes and their new girlfriends when you're coming from the gym because OF COURSE I should have remembered he lived two blocks away while I was deciding if I was too bloated to work out.
LW4: If I'm dating someone I purposely watch porn that looks nothing like the person. That's because I would never want a partner to do the things I'm watching to me, I just get turned on looking at them. Some people really just don't like to mix their fantasy and reality.
"Every man I knew went to bed with Gilda... and woke up with me." - Rita Hayworth
Sing it, sister. I think many of us can relate to that statement, even if we were never THE Gilda.