Okay, I just recreated my account to say: c'mon, Pinners, this site is fucking TRYING and "wah, this sucks, I want my old Hairpin back" is just so disrespectful to the obvious efforts of Jazmine & Co. So New Hairpin, for the record, I have the greatest respect for your determination and spirit to recapture the essence of the Old Hairpin and make it your own.
As for "where did everyone go", well...I migrated over to The Toast because I enjoyed Nicole Cliffe's writing style and found the site playing host to a really wonderful comment community so I pitched my tent, bought the T-shirt, etc.
I know The Hairpin had a few rough years when they sadly waved goodbye to some really talented writers, and perhaps that explains the "ghost town" feel in the comment section: Laws of attraction, y'all. But sweet baby Jeebus, give The New & Improved Hairpin a chance. And lastly, if a writer from a sister site like The Toast can be inspired by 2011 Hairpin posts (perhaps Mallory is free-rolling off it and giving it her own special spin, who really knows) then for goodness sake, why can't The Hairpin do the same, ESPECIALLY SINCE IT WAS THEIR ORIGINAL IDEA.
I am usually the last one to say something like this, but this whole exchange made me wicked uncomfortable. The all-too-familiar forced, artificial, and nervous sweetness and mock expressions of having been flattered, all to de-escalate a rapidly inappropriate and kind of scary interaction.
Be a nice girl and don't give the crazy man any reason to get angry with you and hurt you. GAH. I hate when I revert to that kind of shit, and the truth is, I only do it when I am legitimately afraid of someone.
Also, as others said, for the love of Christ, don't admit fault, liability, or anything of this sort on text messages, voice mail, or anywhere else. JESUS.
@NorieY Yeeeeeeeeeah. I don't want to force a label on the event that the LW isn't comfortable using, but holy shit, more red flags than the time the Matadors' Union and the Semaphore Enthusiasts Convention booked the same hotel.
If you were on the Obama campaign (or on the Romney campaign, or on the really-endearing Gary Johnson campaign), how would you go about attracting the readers of The Hairpin?
Promotional Qream tie-in
@teenie Not only at a lady's house, but in a lady's bed, cuddling? Hayell no.
@Bunburying I thought the same thing! Disliking the "combo of surgery (sharp things) with his most special place (his junk)" is not just a dude thing. I don't want surgery up in my lady parts if not necessary either?!
@Bunburying I wish it would disappear from the Earth.
(But the advice is good!)
"In other words, he's a guy."
I have no problem with the advice here! And I like this Married Guy! But seriously I wish this phrase and others like it would just disappear from Ask a Married Guy and Ask a Dude forever.
No one is winning in this story. Even the vodka sodas are just embarrassed to be sitting there all $14 and sweating water.
@Myrtle Hey! Being from some "flyover state" isn't a bad thing. There are LOTS of driven, good people, with rock solid values from the flyover states!
I do agree that this man seems like a tool, but as a proud country girl, I take some offense that you state someone's origins as a major flaw.
The rest of your paragraph I can support wholeheartedly.