On Everything I Know About Fertility I Learned From the Year 1670

@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose My sister is a nurse too, and a fear monger of the "tick tock tick tock biological clock" type (Yes, she's actually said that to me. Many times.) She's totally wrong. She was freaking me out so much, I went to my gynecologist and asked her about all these age/preggo things, and you know what? She said the same things this article said. So, anyway, point being, I love my gyno, she's the best and nurses can be wrong, especially of the nosy sister variety.

Posted on June 20, 2013 at 4:41 pm 2

On The Insecurity Pie

@fondue with cheddar Ugh! This is bringing back the time in 9th grade biology when all I got this note saying: There is a stain on the back of your skirt and we know what it is. It was was signed by all the popular girls.

Posted on April 11, 2013 at 5:54 pm 1

On Win a Jim Behrle Valentine

@Jim Behrle@twitter Insane enough to eat our toilet brush.

Posted on February 14, 2013 at 8:54 am 1

On Win a Jim Behrle Valentine

I mailed my sister's dog a Valentine, even though her dog is insane.

Posted on February 12, 2013 at 5:55 pm 8

On Cosmo's "Hottest Texts to Send a Guy," Edited

@Dirty Hands That part is my FAVORITE. My very most favorite ever.

Posted on January 30, 2013 at 3:07 pm 0

On Amusingly Horrible Things Significant Others Have Said: The Bracket

My fav from an ex: Having sex with you is like sleeping with a Muppet. A Muppet!

Posted on September 14, 2011 at 4:46 pm 7

On Amusingly Horrible Things Significant Others Have Said: The Bracket

@Doilyhead Oh man, the mustache! My very sweet, but sometimes clueless fiance asked me if I was going to do anything to my upper lip before the wedding.

Posted on September 14, 2011 at 4:40 pm 0

On Breaking Up Is Hard for Teens to Do

A boy I liked agreed to go to a dance with me. A mean girl he liked found out and told him not to go with me. He didn't. They never ended up dating anyway. The night of the dance, my best friend asked our waiter at Hoss's if he would go with me. He also said no. I was pretty undateable.

Posted on August 3, 2011 at 1:02 pm 6

On Save the Kitties

@Nicole Cliffe Don't fret! Miracles can happen! Once, my cat escaped my apartment and disappeared for days. We put up signs everywhere. A while later, someone came and showed us to our flattened little cat's body and we cried and cried.

Flash forward a couple months and who shows up banging up my window but my resurrected cat! Sure, he was skinny and scared and his hair was matted and missing in some parts and he certainly had many misadventures, but he was home and alive! This is a true story!

Posted on July 21, 2011 at 11:38 am 1