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The Witch In All Of Us

When I was 12 I cast a spell on my mom so she’d let me to go my friend Seth’s Bar Mitzvah. It was from The Good Spell Book, which I found in the sale bin at Barnes & Noble, and even though a few pages had been ripped out it still had instructions on how to bend someone to your will. I sat on the floor of my uncle’s old bedroom in my grandparents’ house, with a pink ribbon and a candle and some sort of scented oil and made my Intentions clear to whoever was listening. A few weeks later, she relented and said she’d send me on a bus back early from our beach vacation to go to the Bar Mitzvah, but by that point I felt too guilty about everything I had done to take her up on it. READ MORE

How to Enjoy Art as a Human Being

Start consuming art. Consume everything you can. It doesn’t matter if it’s good or bad, that’s all subjective anyway. Visit museums. Look at every painting, every artifact. Don’t go anywhere without new music on your iPhone or in your car. Get a Netflix subscription. Buy the Criterion Collection. Go to the ballet and cry. READ MORE

Qreamed Quorn

There’s a blissful moment that I hope you all get the chance to experience. The bliss, that is, and not what leads up to it. It’s a moment when you’ve just dragged your trash out into the hallway, and your kitchen smells like hot Berry Kix, and your stomach is starting to settle again, when you see that bottle of Qream on your counter and think “I’m done.” That your work, whatever its legacy or reception will be, is finished. READ MORE

Kahlúa Gingerbread ... Gingerbread

I know. It's obvious. But it's holiday time, and I wanted to decorate some cookies. And I have to say, if you decide to get one egregiously holiday-themed product this year, this is not a bad one to choose (especially compared to Pringles Peppermint or whatever). Straight, it tastes a bit like sweet coffee made with ashes, but mix in some hot milk and by golly you got a nog goin'! READ MORE

Lemon Cookies With Bubblegum Vodka Glaze

Have you ever had a realization, usually sparked by something small, that nearly reduces you to tears over how incredible humans are? That the existence of some bizarre thing we've created proves how silly and creative and purely beautiful we are? This happens to me a lot. I watch a YouTube video of a man playing clarinet while covered in bees, or listen to a song about thrift shopping, or look at the photo my dad texted me of his garden gnome, and I cry because humans are so weird. All of us. We are entirely united in our weirdness. READ MORE

The ChocoVine Chocolate Red Wine Cake

There are a few warnings on ChocoVine's label: READ MORE

Alizé Gold Passion Pineapple Upside Down Cake

There may come a time in your life when you have a bottle of the weirdest alcohol you can possibly imagine. Perhaps someone brought some Green Apple Vodka to your house dorm room, and it has somehow made it to the cabinets in the apartment you live in as a 26-year-old. Maybe you got some 99 Bananas to make one very specific shot at a very specific party and now the bottle is gathering dust. You may have even been totally qurious about Qream and what it can do for you. We’ve all been there. READ MORE

What Happens When You Serve as an Alternate Juror

1. You finally come to terms with the fact that you're not a good liar. You were an okay enough liar to get off the three-week-long medical malpractice suit, but you can’t figure out a good excuse to get off a civil case involving a 12-year-old being hit by a car (he’s fine, everyone) while crossing in the middle of the street. READ MORE

Short Rib Truffle Casserole

As we settle into the long, cold, dark days that come with the final slog through winter, we — your pals from The Hairpin and The Awl — will be bringing you some of our favorite casserole recipes (and crockery recommendations). READ MORE

Qrafting With Qream

So, you bought some Qream. And then you baked a bunch of stuff with it and made all your friends drink it and now you don't really have friends anymore. Instead, you have this overtly yonic, Louis Vuitton-esque bottle gathering dust on your dresser. You want to hate this bottle. You know you should, because the contents were gross and you should just recycle it and move on with a life of sampling the finer liqueurs out there. But then again, it's sorta pretty, right? It's not just like any other bottle. Maybe it would be a shame to throw it away. Maybe it's time to buy some enamel paint. READ MORE