@pterodactylish This was a pretty vitriolic comment for such a reasonable article. Weird. 1) She said it was at a work, so the snide "maybe you need to get some new friends" comment was completely unwarranted, 2) you are aware that in the majority of households, the women do more housework, right? Gender roles are pervasive. I'm glad you only know perfectly enlightened people, but them's the facts, buddy, 3) what in the world is with this newfangled idea that feminism means that every choice a woman makes is unassailably right? It's like xojane feminism. No need to think critically about any of our actions!
@pterodactylish If you got your birth last name from your dad, didn't name come from his dad? So how come it belongs to him more than it belongs to you?
I chose not to change my name for geneaological reasons (there are so many dead ends in my ancestry because I don't know my foremothers' birth surnames!) I don't really care if others do change their names (except when dudes say it's a dealbreaker if their wife doesn't take their name, I find that creepy and awful). But I find the "father's name/husband's name" logic really depressing! Because I'm a woman, my name doesn't really belong to me? That's sad.
This is awesome, and even though the ending wasn't sad, it made me cry. I miss my girl friends, the ones I'm close with (who live on the other side of the country) and those who I have drifted from.
This is so great and so sweet! This post and the self-care one have made me feel very grateful for my own amazing girlfriends.
By Azaz the Unabridged on Sweet Dee
I said "Oh NO, did she die?" out loud three times while reading this.
By loopdeloop on Sweet Dee
This was the sweetest! I'm also happy it didn't have an ending that would have led to me crying in my cube.
@j-i-a The difference between how I see marriage and weddings portrayed in the media, and how I feel when loved ones stand up and pledge their love and commitment to each other, is baffling and ridiculous. Thanks for putting it in such lovely and honest words, Jia. Happy New Year!
By j-i-a on 18 Brides in a Year
you guys, THANK YOU, i really appreciate these comments--it was hard for me to write this and feel confident in any way that i could in words reconcile my abstract aversion to marriage with my concrete bubble-joy every time i see my friends kiss at the altar, and the understanding that if i were in the rawlsian original position i'd probably say the best possible rule for women is "do whatever the fuck you want." but really thank you thank you
This is total perfection and it sums up my feelings on weddings and marriage more eloquently than I ever could.
Jia, you are a fucking star.
By panther on 18 Brides in a Year
There have been a lot of year-in-review type pieces on the internet in the past few days, but this is the best that I've read yet. Love it.