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Relax. You're in Los Angeles.

Last Wednesday I watched a World Cup game—I have no memory of who played—at a mediocre barbecue place in Grass Valley. My friends left at the half, and I was just sitting there by myself, floating in the air conditioning. I thought about watching the second half of the game myself and then decided that would be too boring. READ MORE

42

When I woke up this morning to see that a friend of mine had sent me Tom Junod’s essay, "In Praise of 42 Year Old Women," I felt a lot of things. First of all, I felt happy. I mean, I had been following Junod’s career for many years, and so I've watched him begin so many articles with the word “You.” And this piece began with “Let’s face it,” which was obviously progress. So yeah, I felt good, the kind of good you feel when you see a kid who always walks in Little League get a hit, or when your dog is choking on a piece of rawhide and then just suddenly stops. Except with a dog you were thinking you might have to reach down its throat at some point, and I have never gotten to the point where I thought about reaching down Junod’s throat to extract something other than the pronoun "you." And now, I don’t have to! READ MORE

What Really Happens at the River

We were paddling around in this nice clear pool. It was peaceful and calm and other than us there were only two dudes, somewhere in between the genre of local grower types but possibly Oakland hipsters, swimming around. Then their two pit bulls jumped in. They looked like nice enough pit bulls but they seemed to be getting rather close to us and their paws—which probably each weighed about three pounds—churned the green water like turbines. We gave the pit bulls wary smiles even though pit bulls don’t understand wary smiles. READ MORE

A Swim in Scotts Flat Lake

I went swimming in Scotts Flat Lake for the first time this year on Saturday. I went because it was hot and also because I had a horrible hangover and swimming used to really knock out a hangover for me. READ MORE

A Few Questions About Jill Abramson, From David Brooks For David Brooks By David Brooks

I find myself alternately fascinated, humbled, and engaged by the recent dismissal of Jill Abramson as the editor of this newspaper. Full disclosure: I am a columnist for the New York Times. Put another way: The words you are reading are appearing in the paper that Ms. Abramson, until around noon Wednesday, helmed. READ MORE

The TMZ Style Guide

1. HEADLINES: Font size in headlines should be completely arbitrary. Sometimes the name is emphasized (JAY Z) sometimes the event is emphasized (SUFFERS SEIZURE AT REHAB) sometimes a random phrase (MERCIFUL JUDGE) is emphasized. Whatever is emphasized is not as important as the fact that something is emphasized. READ MORE

Jennifer Lawrence Responds to Esquire's Concerns About Her Drinking

Yesterday, Esquire blogger Ned Hepburn penned A Letter To Jennifer Lawrence About Her Drunkenness. Read it, or not. ("You're lucky you're a total stone-cold fox with a face like a million dollars and a better rack than a master carpenter.") It fits into a wonderful Esquire tradition of I have no idea. Anyway, we did not like this letter, and we do not like this tradition, and we are so pleased that Jennifer Lawrence chose to write back to her critic. READ MORE

When People Say Funny Things When Animals Attack

I go to CNN.com sometimes in the hopes that something terrible has happened that might provide me with a good excuse to stop working for a moment. I am rarely thus rewarded. That said, I did buy myself a few moments of happiness today with this video of a Maine man being attacked by a moose: READ MORE

Two Ways to Order a Shake

I work in a co-working space. (For all of you who ask me what that is,  I say, "a co-working space is a place where you pay a few hundred dollars a month to share an office space with people, and also, how are you such a genius that you have thus far managed to avoid reading the annoying publications in which you would have learned this annoying term?") In said co-working space, I share a small room with two other writers. We have recently taken to calling our little room The Suicide Suite, because off of it is a beautiful balcony on which we are prohibited from standing as it could easily just snap off the building, like a bad lego. A member of our co-working space's dog once toddled off this balcony,  and as this dog is no longer with us—balcony not at fault here—there is talk of naming it after him. But we'll have to check with the owner first and right now he is in a foreign country, teaching people to do something which I will forget as many times as it is explained to me. READ MORE

Annotating Dr. Oz's The Good Life

Dr. Oz has a new magazine. It's called The Good Life, and according to Dr. Oz’s editor’s note, the purpose of this new venture is  “to make your life more vital and more meaningful... Every word will be treated as preciously as the person reading it.” So I read the magazine, asking myself as I went: Did The Good Life make my life feel more vital and more meaningful? Did every word make me feel precious? Please join me on this very personal journey through Dr. Oz’s The Good Life. READ MORE