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On How the Nutcracker Wrecked My Christmas

The smell of the person who wore Grandmother's wig and the Mouse King's Head before you.

Posted on December 23, 2013 at 9:07 pm 0

On Ask a Glutton: I Need to Trick Everyone Into Thinking I'm an Adult This Thanksgiving

@Elle Marie@twitter Pre-making rocks. I'm doing my stuffing in the crockpot, because- massive amounts of stuffing. Anything that needs to be pre-cooked gets cooked before. It goes in for 2-4 hours on low (watch it, it may bake faster in yours) then sits on warm until you eat.

Posted on November 27, 2013 at 1:53 pm 0

On Take a Nice Selfie at My Funeral

@KeLynn I think most kids aged 11-19 are that level of self-absorbed, that doesn't mean they're little shits. It means they're aged 11-19. Most of them grow out of it. Some of them grow up to be judgmental too.

Posted on November 1, 2013 at 8:08 pm 0

On Take a Nice Selfie at My Funeral

We've taken a few nice family photos at funerals. We're all together and we're all dressed up. It's one of the few times.

Posted on November 1, 2013 at 8:05 pm 0

On A Revenge Scenario For Student Loan Borrowers

@kate.m I agree. I think Elizabeth Warren should lead the revolt. I think, in real life, if it will work, yeah, there will be casualties. I think the first few hundred or so to try this will have their wages garnished and lose their homes (if they have them) and all the other things that happen during a revolt. But if they are vocal maybe there will be change.
I don't know if it will be with me. I am kind of comfortable and snarky (see below).

Posted on October 16, 2013 at 5:54 pm 0

On A Revenge Scenario For Student Loan Borrowers

Posted on October 16, 2013 at 5:50 pm 0

On A Revenge Scenario For Student Loan Borrowers

"Hey new grads, let's get together and not pay our loans back until we get 0.75% interest."
"Whoo hoo!!! No loan payment this month!!!"
"Well, you have to put the money in an escrow account. That way you look responsible and you have it to pay back later."
"No, you said I didn't have to pay it back. I don't wanna."
"It's collective bargaining. It will work."
"Whatever. I'm getting cheese fries."

Posted on October 16, 2013 at 5:50 pm 1

On Brain Trouble

@YoungCrone Oh yeah. My lupus is the same thing. I was so good at faking sick I ended up needing a kidney transplant. I think that is, like, ninja level fake-outs there.
People are douchebags sometimes.

Posted on October 10, 2013 at 7:22 pm 0

On Boy-Crazy But Curious, Dating While Disabled, and Introducing Parents to Your "New Norm"

@thelovehater I don't have MS but I have lupus (SLE). I use a cane from time to time. I have gone out dancing (well, with people who were dancing) with my cane.
I've also done the online dating thing, the blind date thing, the random hook up thing.
What eventually worked for me was taking the time to get to know my partner really, really well. He knew about my disease up front, he wasn't about trying to baby me or fetishize it and he wasn't after me for my painkillers.

Posted on September 22, 2013 at 10:43 am 0

On What Kind of Restaurant Are You?

@Statham I like to think I'm a laid back coffee- or tea-house, with cool salads and local baked goods, but really, I'm a Starbucks, with a made-up language and unspoken rules and an unbridled lust for world domination.

Posted on August 18, 2013 at 1:29 pm 0