@Amphora I've learned that whenever someone calls themselves "a benefactor," it's basically the same as when they open with "as a taxpayer," and they're about to do something really douchey. Also, it usually means "I gave ten dollars to your organization over a decade ago."
It's been a long time since I've read Lolita, but didn't Charlotte Haze go absolutely ballistic when she found Humbert's diary and read about his infatuation with her daughter? Like, she was storming out of the house in a blind fury to denounce his ass when she got hit by the car, right?
@mirror_father_mirror The guys who are just on pussy patrol don't tend to stick around nearly as long as guys who are girlfriend-zoning you, though.
@Regina Phalange If you're not getting any romance vibes off this dude, and you're not even hanging out with him alone, fuck the gender-segregationists. Seriously.
@leon s I think "bromance" is kind of catching on.
@tea sonata I've gotten to the point where I feel like awful dudes should be informed that they're awful, so my vote would be for the "actually telling him 'Bullet dodged!'" option. Though I'll also admit to the possibility of just being an ass.
@martinipie Mine's a calculated attempt to lower expectations for my posts.
@Lesliepop I imagine someone coming over and pounding on the door yelling "What is going on in there?", only to have it opened by a harried human and reveal a screaming dog. Like, you probably don't want to know after you see what's making the noise.
@TheBelleWitch But it's like a tiara that you could feed your enemies to!