Talking to Kelly Lewis, Professional Solo Female Traveler

Kelly Lewis is the founder of Go! Girl Guides, a company that writes and publishes guidebooks for solo female travelers, as well as a beloved friend of mine. READ MORE

Befriending Your Best Friend's Girlfriend and Resisting the "One True Sex Act"

I'm polyamorous, and live with my partner, and have a long distance relationship with someone I love dearly. I've been with my partner for almost three years, and we are in a very solid, happy place. My long-distance sweetie and I have had an intense Thing happening since this past April—so about five months, all of it online (we lived in the same town years ago, but have lived in different parts of the country for the last few years.) READ MORE

The Glittery Fountain In the Sky, Staying Closeted For Your Career, and Lesbian FOMO

I feel like, abruptly and without warning, my sexuality has changed from a basically heterosexual girl (with some twinges of attraction towards women), to a homosexual girl (with some twinges towards men). The 'Are you a lesbian?' videos and articles I've Googled have mentioned that some people are not born gay, but these seem to be uniformly written by born-gay folks. I'm really uncomfortable with this change and its abruptness, and have a few questions. Is sexuality changing a thing? READ MORE

Boy-Crazy But Curious, Dating While Disabled, and Introducing Parents to Your "New Norm"

I've always identified, both to myself and to others, as straight. There were times when I thought about other girls as a young girl, but then read in some magazine or other that this was "totally normal! Just a passing crushphase!" and I brushed it off, as seems to have happened to some other readers. READ MORE

Survival Prognoses for Characters on Orange is the New Black If They Were Instead Characters on Game of Thrones

Piper Chapman: Attempts to endear herself to the Queen of Thorns by providing her with artisanal soaps—rose-scented, of course. Cersei observes this gesture and, believing Piper to be allied with the Tyrells and disloyal to the crown, has her accused of treason and executed. Total survival time: 8 days (3 spent in prison awaiting trial). READ MORE

Dating a Closeted Bi Guy, Discovering a Boob Fetish, and Sleeping With Twins

So there's this guy that I (a hetero, female college student) have been unofficially seeing for about two months, not exclusively. We recently had a conversation that could lead to this becoming a more serious relationship, but we're taking a break for the summer because we'll be in different places. Here's where this gets messy: a friend intimated to me, shortly after the aforementioned DTR convo, that this guy is, in fact, gay. He has or has had a profile on an online hookup site for the gay community, and has slept with other guys. I had absolutely no idea about any of this (yikes!), and I can't confirm that he has slept with other girls, having not yet gotten that far in the relationship ourselves. It appears that he is keeping this information extremely private, and I think it's safe to say he would be displeased to discover that I have this information, especially because I got it from an outside source. READ MORE

Lesbian Vocabulary, U-Hauls, and the Family That Comes Out Together

Just so you know, I'm straight. You're the best person to help me because I need to "come out" to my ultra-conservative, evangelical Christian family. I have not been involved in their religion in many years, but I was raised in it. Since becoming an adult and leaving the church, I have some family members who have become distant or cold, some who actively try to save me, and some who treat me like they always have. My entire extended family belongs to this religion. READ MORE

Weird Boyfriends and Height Differences

My boyfriend and I have been together for just over a year and a half and have lived together since last June. For the most part, things are really great between us. We're both 29. When I was 20 and 21, I kissed other girls (I was drunk both times) and I had a good time but it didn't go further than kissing. While I like looking at pretty women, I have never wanted to have sex with a woman. My boyfriend found some pictures of me kissing a girl (from when I was 21) and for a while didn't believe me when I told him there was nothing beyond the pictures. When he finally accepted that I was telling the truth, he became and is really disappointed. He really wanted me to have fooled around with a woman! He seems a bit different towards me now and says he is not as attracted to me. How do I help (or how does he help himself) get over his disappointment? He seems kind of obsessed with this and I want to help him understand that it doesn't matter that I haven't fooled around with a woman and that that fact shouldn't affect how he sees me. Do you have any suggestions for me/us? Thank you!! READ MORE

Recreational Flirting and Other People's LDRs

As a semi-closeted queer girl (as in, I'll tell people if they ask but don't go around covered in rainbows or anything, and it seems like "short hair, blazers, and DMs" reads as "fashiony" rather than "gaymo" at the moment), most of my friends who I don't meet through gay stuff start off assuming I'm straight. This is not a big deal; they tend to pick up after a while, but it does lead to some awkward situations. It's common among female friends my age to flirt, call each other sexy, cuddle and grope each other, make elaborate declarations of love or proposals of marriage, joke about having crushes on each other and female celebrities, and generally fool around. (Note: they exclusively date & have sex with guys, this is not a case of youthful exploration, this is a hilarious game.) READ MORE

Bi Identification, Moving Out, and the Rhinestone-Encrusted Manicure

1. I am a lady who has identified as bi since she was sixteen, in an 'I like people based purely on music taste and tattoos' kind of way. I lived in a conservative town so I didn't act on liking ladies seriously until uni, when I had some short-term relationships with unsuitable women. I ended up dating a man who got very turned on by the idea or inviting a woman into bed with us. He was really into BDSM, and we had a master/slave aspect to everything we did. He wanted it to be like that 24/7, but it was just the entirety of our private life. Eventually we did invite a girl to bed, and it was AWFUL. I felt really used, and hated that he seemed to like her body more than mine ... I reacted by going VERY homophobic, and started to hate that side of myself. I couldn't do anything after we left (dress myself without permission was an issue, for instance), and my homophobia was eventually sorted by my very sympathetic LGBTQ activist friends listening to a lot of bullshit. READ MORE