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By commanderbanana on "The cost for each attendee: $4000. And that was after Tracy’s fiancé paid one night for everyone at the W hotel"

Man, you know, there was a time when people did stuff like get married and have kids, etc., without demanding that everyone else sacrifice a lot of time and money to reward them for...doing stuff. When do I get to demand a shower for successfully laundering my sheets or a girls' weekend away when I make it through a grocery run without buying anything not already on my list??

Posted on October 28, 2013 at 12:00 pm 5

By marklosangeles on Interview with Filmmaker Izzy Chan: "Have we adjusted our expectations of what a man needs to bring to the table?"

Hi there.

House husband here. I have zero issues with it.
a) I hated office work
b) I don't have the 'pack mentality' of most men
c) I'm not American. Where I'm from (Australasia) this is perfectly normal, especially in the creative industries. Every musician/artist/actor/director I know back home has a successful corporate wife, and 90% (literally 9 out of the 10 I could think of) have been married over a decade. This I think is more because we have a more even balance in general between the genders. Here in the US, this situation results in hilariously middle-class docos (as above) and bad sitcoms.
d) The kids will be just fine, honest.

Posted on September 26, 2013 at 7:51 pm 5

By RNL on Friday Open Thread

@panther One thing I have done is really really try to change the way I look at other people's bodies. I have a harder time not snarking my OWN body, but I try not to EVER snark anyone else's body, even (especially) in my own head. I also try to actively see how attractive people who aren't thin are, and fat inspiration blogs and so on are quite helpful. I have found it revolutionary, or radical even - over time I have realized how completely FUCKED our idea of beauty is.

I also try never to say anything negative out loud about my own body or other people's bodies.

These are not cures, but they are helpful in addressing my self-hatred, and feel like pretty simple, enactable rules to me.

And you know what: you, and Zac Efron, only live once. It's sooooo fucking true. And the body you have is the body you have. You can live a life where you love it or you can live a life where you hate it. It's a choice, but it's a choice like a running a marathon, or quitting smoking (nice one, Aphrabean!). One you have to make every day, and keep working at, and accept failure along the way. You're not bad for hating your body and the way you look, but you're hurting yourself and restricting your own spirit. Without that hatred you will be more free.

Some days I'm like "RNL you FOOL for thinking that you are beautiful! You are ugly and fat!" But am I a fool, even if I AM ugly and fat? I have decided to change my subjective view of my own body to *beautiful*, because it's a belief that serves me. And it really doesn't matter what other poeple think, does it? Because all of the things you think other people are thinking are made up by you. They're in your own head. You don't know what other people are thinking, because you are not them, and those negative thoughts are your own fantasies.

I used to think nobody would EVER like my body, because it is ugly and fat. Well, it is fat, but plenty of people don't think it's ugly. Ugly was a story I was telling to myself, and I'm trying to stop telling it.

ETA: I re-read your comment, and I want to hug you very much.

Posted on May 10, 2013 at 5:52 pm 6

By par_parenthese on Friday Open Thread

@kate.m Intuitive eating!! SO GREAT. I don't have a lot of wisdom, but man it is so freaking worth it to learn to trust and love yourself and your body! GO YOU. Good vibes and happy thoughts for your journey.

Posted on April 19, 2013 at 4:43 pm 2

By I'm Right on Top of that, Rose on Things Significantly Worse Than a Fight at the Roosevelt Island Garden Club

@kate.m Sharing it. Keeping it in the public's eye. Because we'll think about it for two minutes, and the fuzzy thought of, "Hey, wait a minute, this isn't right..." will get distracted by a video of kittens or whatever.

Posted on April 15, 2013 at 3:27 pm 1

By skyslang on Sex Phases, Red Flags, and "I Just Don't Think You'd Be a Good Parent"

LW #3: It doesn't matter what goes on in other people's relationships. What matters is how YOU feel and what YOU want. It's OK to feel the way you are feeling, to want sex less frequently. If you're putting pressure on yourself to do it a certain amount, you're making sex into a job. It should be a pleasure! Give yourself a break and let your desire come and go, act on it when you feel like it, have good (if infrequent) sex and check in with your dude to make sure he understands you still love him, and that he's getting his needs met.

Posted on March 8, 2013 at 4:17 pm 1

By BosomBuddy on Friday Bargain Bin: The B Stands For...

PSA: JCrew is offering 40% off final sale items and DSW is offering up to 70% off clearance on their shoes (there's some nice stuff in there!)

Posted on January 25, 2013 at 12:39 pm 1

By Stephanie Boland@twitter on Be the Change, Jerks

@kate.m Thank you for this- I think I understand a couple of my friends a little better. I'd never thought of it from that perspective.

Posted on January 4, 2013 at 3:49 pm 3

By dinos on How to Boil Eggs

@Beatrix Kiddo The secret is to use not-too-fresh eggs. The ones straight from the farm (like, less than a week old) have the clingiest membranes, but you're not getting those at a grocery store. What also helps is putting freshly cooked eggs into a bowl of cold water and changing it out every couple of minutes until the eggs are no longer warm to the touch.

(Why do I have so many opinions about eggs? Who am I?)

Posted on October 17, 2012 at 4:26 pm 19

By cherrispryte on A Chat With Geoff, an Actual Ghost-Believer, in Which I Clearly Care About Ghosts a Lot More Than He Does

What if ghosts do in fact exist as an image of their physical being, so we all could be having all sorts of ghost interactions AND NOT KNOW THAT WE'VE ENCOUNTERED GHOSTS, eh?

Posted on October 17, 2012 at 2:35 pm 7