@par_parenthese Oh I literally laughed out loud at that.
@meetapossum That is my drunk "tell" too! Also I like to tell people how wonderful they are. It may be annoying, but I like to think it is better to be an affectionate drunk, than an angry drunk.
I love hugs! But totally understand about the social awkwardness that can entail with hugging. Moving to Montreal opened a whole new door of social awkwardness of the double kiss, six years in and I have yet to quite adapt. I always almost makeout with inappropriate people. WHY CAN'T EVERYONE LEAN THE SAME DIRECTION YOU WOULD HAND SHAKE? WHY?
Anyway, just because I went on a downward spiral in youtube yesterday (avoiding working on my thesis defense)and found this...I will post. The power of a hug (in a dog...no social awkwardness to worry about). Warning: It's five minutes long and may make you cry.
@Apocalypstick Fair enough. I would fail that litmus test. I usually call it a "girl crush" or a "lady crush" for exactly this reason. But sexuality for me is on a gradient and my "crush" on Alison Brie is closer to the "gay" end of the scale than my "crush" on other super cool lady celebrities. To put it in context, I would say my crush on Alison Brie is equivalent to my crush on Donald Glover. Let's say it would be equivalent to a grade school crush. Where I would totally die if the bottle landed on them during spin the bottle. But before the concept of face on genitalia was really on the table, so to speak. And my desire to comment was along that adolescent mindset. "OMG Alison Brie! I love her too!".
But I think being bothered by that isn't erasing heteroflexible people. It could easily be a genuine annoyance very worthy of expression. Even in the response to #3 it was included about having crushes on Straight girls at some point, then getting over that. So if #3 wanted to get some lady action she should put some vibes out. I think it completely makes sense to be irritated by straight girls talking about crushes on other girls, when they would not have any interest in sex with that person.
I know I sit a little closer to the gay end of the scale than a lot of my straight friends, but not as close to that end of the scale as my bi or gay friends. So expressing annoyance isn't in any way erasing my heterflexibility, it is just giving me opportunity to clarify it. I don't have cruses on girls that are "Omigod Massive Lesbian Crush" but this straight lady has crushes on girls that include a certain degree of sexual attraction and I'm cool with that. But if I had a crush like that on a real person who was gay, I wouldn't play around with it. Because I know I would fail your litmus test, and in that context it wouldn't be cool.
Sorry, apparently I decided to write an essay about my straight girl crushes...
All great advice as usual! But #3, drop more hints than just a crush on Alison Brie. Some straight girls have a crush on her too. So that won't out you ;)
"So are you on birth control? Do you smoke? Are you over 35? Do you have purpose in life?"
"So we'll set you up with physiotherapy and stuff, but you probably should have had a purpose in life, I suggest you get one to prevent another stroke" oh ok. thanks doc.
@khaleesi ugh I hate comments like that. But the best time was when it got turned around on me. I was jogging and I had to jog by a bench full of teenagers (Mohawks, chains, the works) and I could see them looking at me as I approached and saying stuff to each other. I braced myself for some sexist, offensive comment. But instead one of them shouted "it's hot out, make sure you drink some water". It was hot and when I got home I saw my face was really red, like really red, from the heat. So he showed me! Showed me concern for my well being. And here I was expecting a comment about my ass or something...
@Better to Eat You With I keep thinking about your clarification of my misuse of the word "censor". I meant "censor" yet didn't realize how much I actually did not at all. I did technically know the definition, but still completely misused it AND you make such a valid point about legitimate critical response being labelled as censorship. Not at all what I intended to do. This is an example of word policing which was really effective! You kind of blew my mind!
@Flies in my eyes edit *latter not later