On Hard Out Here for a White Feminist

I saw this as not piss take-y enough, so the vid actually came across as perpetuating what is tried to tear down, and quite racist as a result. I don't like all this gear with black ladies shaking their booty in slo mo - with a fully clothed white woman as their crowning glory in the middle, either.

If Allen, or anyone like her in that industry wanted to crate a real critique, they'd come at it as any normal woman in her living room would. No makeup, bad hair, no fancy lighting, no waxing or tanning, fat flying, and just jumping around in her trackies.

I just don't see why a fully dolled-up woman prancing around backup dancers is 'revolutionary' or 'feminist'. If she really was as smart as she says, she would have created something wholly original, fun and new.

And I normally quite like Lily Allen, but I think she is way off the mark here - taste-wise, race-wise, and feminism-wise.

Posted on November 14, 2013 at 12:12 am 15

On Confessions of a Yukon Arm Wrestling Champion, Women's Division

Damn, woman! I like you very much after reading this. I am a lady of the 'tall/huge shoulders/big knockers' camp too. And I've gone a lifetime of people asking me if I was a swimmer, and if not, why not. Do your shoulders take up more than their share on the bus or tram too? Men have always liked my chest, but moreso women. To this day, after a few drinks, random ladies will race up at the pub, and without asking bury their face in my hills just to go 'Brrrrr'!

The first time I was glad of my physique was when I travelled alone through West Africa. I felt I could hold my own against the amazing 7-foot amazons and statuesque beauties they've got over there. I've never skiied but I now fence - everyone in my club is tiny and quick, but at least I am solid and can hold my own physically!!

Posted on May 6, 2013 at 7:18 pm 0

On The Least Appealing Foods I’ve Eaten in Eight Years of Travel Writing

I am white as the driven snow and I have to say that durian is truly the King of Fruits. You're all mad!! It's sublime, particularly when eaten on a roadside in Singapore followed by fresh mangosteen, otherwise known as the Queen!

And yes, it it like eating garlic icecream out of a toilet bowl, but that is what makes it special!!

Posted on May 6, 2013 at 7:05 pm 5

On Scandals of Classic Hollywood: The Most Wicked Face of Theda Bara

@rallisaurus YES. Also the description where she 'sits like a scissors' all day. Followed by many triumphant scenes at the doctors throughout her entire life. LOVE LOVE la Swanson.

Posted on January 8, 2013 at 7:45 pm 0

On The Classiest Classic Movies I Revisited This Year

And thankyou AHP for all the writings this year!! At your behest my mum secured a copy of SWANSON ON SWANSON for my Xmas present which I am now halfway through and brightened my holidays immeasurably.

Posted on January 1, 2013 at 10:40 pm 0

On Ideas for a Solo Traveler

India! Grouse times to be had on your own, they speak English and are lovely (ignore anyone who says Indians are rude to ladies on their own, this is exception not rule), and if you stick to 1 or 2 states then you can keep it contained. Also, cheap as cheap.

I wrote a piece on the sort of lunatic advice people will give you before you travel solo - you may want to read it so you know that most of it you can laugh off: http://www.thevine.com.au/life/travel/travelling-with-breasts/

Have fun, we're all jealous!!

Posted on November 13, 2012 at 1:18 am 1

On The Billionaire

Arrrrr thank you again Carolita! A fine read, as usual. As an ex-animator I want to say that I also love your linework - lovely!

Posted on September 24, 2012 at 11:26 pm 0

On The Birth of Cute

When I worked in animation (2D) we were always taught that whatever character has the same proportions as a baby or toddler would be far cuter and therefore more appealing. See Tweety Bird for an example - big head, big eyes, small body just like a baby. (happy for people to disagree - I frickin hated Tweety Bird as a kid and still do - give me Foghorn Leghorn any day!!)

If you look at less appealing characters (eg Disney villains we're all supposed to hate) - check out their proportions. Also usually drawn from 'below' to make them look taller, more intimidating to kids.

Posted on July 26, 2012 at 8:42 pm 1

On How to Talk to Your Average Four-Year-Old

Over Easter this year I was staying at my boyfriend's parents in Sydney for only the second time. His 4-y-o nephew cornered me and demanded to see my vagina. He'd already asked my BF and his Mum previously, in both times getting a curt 'that's not appropriate'. Said nephew kept at it, eventually getting more and more hysterical. It was...TOO MUCH. I tried to walk that same line of not making him feel ashamed about being curious and at the same time saying NO. This didn't deter him at all.

Would appreciate any Hairpin-style thoughts about how this could have played out better because...arrrrggghhhhh

Posted on July 11, 2012 at 7:14 pm 0

On The League of Ordinary Ladies: Oh, Water Polo

I'd just like to chip in here with another pointless fact that I KNOW ALL ABOUT THAT WATER POLO MATCH because my Dad was THERE, working with St John Ambulance as a young scout. He has told that story just about every year since I was a young 'un.

Other bloodthirsty facts from this era include the Hungarian who went nuts after the war and chopped up a bunch of people in a darkened cinema with an axe.

He told me this when I was really young, and to this day I still can't sit in the aisle.

In all other ways our family has nothing against Hungarians.

Posted on May 16, 2012 at 4:43 am 2