On Scientology and Me, Part Four: Disconnection

...and now I'm crying at my desk. THANKS A LOT.

Seriously, thanks. This series is amazing.

Posted on November 26, 2012 at 12:12 pm 2

On Ass? Stella?

"The sister of a guy I know's wife's friend is a teacher and totally had this girl named La-a Orangejello in her class a couple years ago. No really."

If I had a dollar for any time I've heard a version of the above, I'd have...at least 5-6 dollars.

Posted on May 1, 2012 at 9:51 am 6

On Reflecting on Black Friday

@DrFeelGood For various reasons that I really don't have the energy to get into, I'm basically against all people who think everyone else should live by their personal moral standards.

Posted on April 26, 2012 at 10:33 pm 2

On Why, Rihanna?

@beanie What's the moral here? I'll tell you - don't listen to morning drive-time radio.

Posted on February 21, 2012 at 7:10 pm 3

On Why, Rihanna?

@Magpie Shinies You're not sorry.

"Please consider me in all your future editorial decisions. Thank you. Also, I have radiation sickness so please ask me about that."

Posted on February 21, 2012 at 7:03 pm 11

On Crest Whitestrips, the Movie

@_ribstbbq_ *call me

Posted on September 26, 2011 at 8:29 pm 1

On You Have One New Death

A few years ago, an ex-girlfriend was murdered by the guy she left me for. I haven't been able to bring myself to remove her as a Facebook friend (we stayed friendly after the breakup, even as she grew less social and retreated into her abusive, paranoid relationship). Occasionally, my assortment of random Facebook pictures on my profile will show pictures she posted of us. It is difficult. On her birthday, Facebook tells me annually to leave a happy birthday message. That seems inappropriate.

Posted on August 31, 2011 at 8:39 pm 0

On Were You Alive In...

@Brunhilde Me too, highfive!

Posted on July 15, 2011 at 3:41 pm 0

On Don't Be the Last Girl on Your Block Without a Freaky Cup

This is one of those things (those AWESOME things) where at first glance, I'm all like, "pfft...that was made by an ARTIST? *I* could do something like that."

But then I think about it for a sec and I'm like, "wait, no, that's awesome and I could never have come up with that."

Posted on May 27, 2011 at 7:13 pm 0

On A Ring You Can Eat

@DearyMe You've never heard of a beet? Do you live in a cave in the desert?

Posted on May 23, 2011 at 7:22 pm 1