On The Ruthlessometer

@bocadelperro You know, sociopath and psychopath are actually different classifications. Sociopath is a clinical manifestation of antisocial personality traits, and it's usually a product of environmental adversity. Sociopaths are more likely to be able to feel empathy and form social relationships but have behavioral issues and behave/feel somewhat differently socially than psychopaths. Psychopathy is an innate phenomenon more closely associated with temperament and enduring personality, as well as antisocial or even violent tendencies at a very young age.

Posted on October 31, 2012 at 11:52 am 0

On The Ruthlessometer

@Canard I just took this quiz and got a 155/224, a "high" score. Why are ours on completely different scale?

Posted on October 31, 2012 at 11:45 am 0

On The Ruthlessometer

Posted on October 31, 2012 at 11:44 am 0

On Stay-at-Home Dads and the Confrontation-Averse

@Lady Humungus This. I'm getting married on Monday at city hall (WOW. that's really soon.), because we want to get married right now but don't want a big production. We're planning to have a semi-casual reception at a local vineyard next year with family and friends, but it won't be a big production either. We both have great, supportive families, and even so, the idea of spending so much money, time, and effort on something I just don't really care about is just NO.

I can't say I really get the whole wedding thing. I want to be married, not have a stressful, expensive party. Plus, I've always thought that I would feel super awkward doing something really intimate and important in front of tons of people...it will feel more real and more special with just the two of us.

Posted on October 19, 2012 at 4:07 pm 1

On Loaner Shirts, Neon Books, and the Meanings of Sleazy

Ms. #4, don't just throw out all those books! Please donate them to a used stuff store, a book drive, or maybe even to a library; and then we could all have a chance to check out, and subsequently be embarrassed by, your neon copy of Beginners Guide to Waffles.

Posted on October 2, 2012 at 2:27 pm 5

On Mizzzzzz


You know what they say: A woman needs a man like a fish needs health insurance, if, you know, that fish required thousands of dollars of medical care and it's tiny start-up company's pathetic, expensive insurance plan didn't offer maternity coverage.

Posted on October 2, 2012 at 1:26 pm 0

On Mizzzzzz

@Beatrix Kiddo Ah yes, the old "your HUSBAND" trick. I've gotten this a bunch of times at my OBGYN's office, even though I don't wear an engagement ring and I'm pretty sure my chart still says single. But they all refer to him as my husband when he comes in, because DUH, unmarried women can't get pregnant -- because they don't have sex!!! It's a foolproof system. Just like birth control pills.

And you can keep your shotgun wedding jokes to yourselves.

Posted on October 2, 2012 at 1:24 pm 0

On Mizzzzzz

When I was a little kid trying to understand the difference between Miss, Ms, and Mrs, I was so confused by it. WHY, I wondered, were there title changes for unmarried/married women but not for men? Why did we still call my very elderly, single music teacher "miss" when "mrs" clearly suited her so much better? And why wasn't there a special term for old, married men that was more formidable and elderly, like Meister? Or Maestro?

Once I was a bit older and really "got it," I became increasingly infuriated by this inequality. Even now, it still irks me that Mrs/Miss even exist! At the very most, there should be one term for men, one term for women. But even that ignores those who don't associate with either gender or don't feel well suited to the term that is assigned their particular sex, which begs the question, why have a term like this at all and will there ever be an adequate gender neutral equivalent that everyone can use? Bahh humbug.

I'm getting married very soon, and I am not changing my name, nor do I intend to use the title "Mrs." I am just about ready to full-on eat the next person who assumes I am about to become Mrs. HisLastName. No one ever asks him if he's excited to be Mss. HerLastName!

Posted on October 2, 2012 at 10:56 am 6

On If at First You Don’t Conceive, Try, Try Again (and Don’t BD Until Your CM Is EW)

@Greta M. HA..."difficult BM" means something TOTALLY different on the pregnancy forums where I roll. Skipped right past the wedding and TTC communities thanks to Ye Olde Birth Control Pill Failure.

Posted on September 26, 2012 at 4:01 pm 0

On If at First You Don’t Conceive, Try, Try Again (and Don’t BD Until Your CM Is EW)

@Pool Party Not having other pregnant/child-toting friends is making me so sad right now. I am 13 weeks surprise-pregnant (seriously, fuck LO-LO-ESTRIN FE!). All of my friends have been so supportive, but I am unexpectedly pregnant at not-quite-25 and NONE of my friends have babies. Or even an inkling of babies. Only a couple of them even have long term jobs or boyfriends, and now that I'm "settling down" already, I'm afraid that our paths will diverge and I'll lose them. I know they love me and won't abandon me or whatever, but I fear that things will be too different in our friendship once I suddenly have a baby and we are just at different places in our lives. I used to think that I would be right there with them, unattached, living the crazy life in my early/mid 20s. Yet, somehow still with 'that guy' I hooked up with after 'that party' freshman spring. Somehow I'm in a place where having a family is doable and actually kind of awesome. When I realized I was pregnant, I surprised myself and shocked my friends by deciding to actually stay pregnant. I have a feeling none of them will be having babies for approximately 5 years...which is wonderful for them and just kind of aww, shucks, for me. Anyway, I'm trying to think of ways to meet some new mom-ly friends (pregnancy yoga, maybe??) but there's a huge part of me that wishes I was going through all of this at the same time as the rest of my friends.

Posted on September 26, 2012 at 3:55 pm 0