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Depression, Mothers-in-Law, Friendzones

1. At what point does your wife trump your mother? READ MORE

Sex Phases, Red Flags, and "I Just Don't Think You'd Be a Good Parent"

1. I've been conditioned by quizzes in magazines and movies to believe that it's a red flag when a man has trouble with the idea of marriage. My boyfriend of a year and a half and I talk about marriage frequently. Neither of us are in a hurry to get married. Recently, he blurted out, "I don't really like the idea of marriage." READ MORE

Affection, Gift Returns, and Professors on Facebook

I'm 30 and live with my boyfriend of four years. We have sex a couple times a week and occasionally he will tolerate a few minutes of cuddling, but otherwise we touch minimally. This seems like a trivial thing to whine about, but I really miss making out. I think physical contact is an important way to feel bonded with somebody. I might be fine with the companionship dynamic if we were perhaps in our 60s, but at this point it mostly serves to make me feel lonely and subtly rejected (I try to kiss him on occasion, but he generally grimaces and turns away). We've discussed this multiple times and my boyfriend grasps that it's an issue for me, he just "isn't a touchy guy." He is also not verbally affectionate, so he mainly shows his love through tasks such as taking out the garbage, picking me up if I'm caught on my bike in the rain, etc. READ MORE

Selective Empathy and "An Outlet for Maternal Feelings"

1. You Married Dudes are driving me nuts! Or, I'm driving myself nuts, I don't know. I'm one of those women the Big Chatty Articles have been talking about recently — I've worked hard, and I'm more successful and make more money than most men my age, or so it seems. And I can't find anyone to date seriously. The people who've achieved the kind of success I find attractive — I'm not attracted to unsuccessful men, or women either, I suppose — are usually older than me, by about 10 years. And men 10 years older than I am are usually married. So, nope can't date him, can't date him either, or that one. READ MORE

Shared Spaces, Lie-Measurement, and the Manageable Hassle

1. I've been with my husband for four years, although we have just been married a few months. We have a really great relationship, with just a few issues, and the biggest one for me is housework. He does NOTHING. And it drives me insane. I think it's a combination of a lot of things — his parents are hoarders so he grew up in a very messy house, and he has adult ADD which can make it impossible for him to focus on things, especially things he doesn't want to do. He feels bad about not helping, he apologizes, and he laments over the difficulty of changing. But after four years, I'm at my wit's end. I know that this is partially my fault — I mean, I knew what I was getting into! And he's a good person, very loving and caring, and our relationship is otherwise very good. I know I have my own faults and craziness, so I try to appreciate the other things he does for me. But I feel this issue building inside of me like a big, ugly resentment monster, and I just don't know what to do. READ MORE

Stay-at-Home Dads and the Confrontation-Averse

1. My husband went from having two jobs when we were first married to now being a stay-at-home dad. He raises our toddler daughter, runs our household like a tight ship, is a fantastic cook, and manages our finances so well that we live fairly comfortably on one salary. READ MORE

Debt-Sharing and Mismatched Ambition

My husband is a generally wonderful partner, except for one issue. He refuses to pay one cent of my hefty school loans. I am a lawyer and owe about $100k. He feels I went to law school before we were married and therefore he is not responsible for them. We contribute jointly to household expenses and provide for our child, but anything extra he earns goes straight into his secret bank account, whereas every cent I earn goes toward the loans with little personal money left for me. Every time I want to take a trip or buy new appliances or whatnot, he says “if you didn’t have those loans, we could.” I cannot get him to understand that those loans are what enable me to earn $90k a year and therefore he benefits from them, too. I asked him if he’d rather I was a barista making $9/hour and he responded that at least I wouldn’t have the loans. Is he being a big jerk, or does he have a right to not want to be responsible for student debt I took on before we knew each other? READ MORE

Workplace Mistakes and Greenerish Grasses

A year ago, while just finishing school, I got very drunk at a work event and hooked up with a co-worker who is definitively senior to me. He had very aggressively hit on me before at work events, but I had rebuffed his advances. On this occasion, however, after he bought me many, many shots of Van Gogh (ugh), and while in a bit of a sexually experimental phase, I let him put his hand up my skirt and then left with him. Huge mistake. Especially as he has a lovely long-term girlfriend, whom I have met quite a few times, and deserves none of this. READ MORE

Baggage, "Bed Death," and Suspected Infidelity Triangles

1.  I am an unmarried mom lady, age 39, with no romantic prospects. Apparently this is a horrible thing, but for the most part I am a happy individual. Maybe I'm kidding myself, but I love my life: I have friends, I read books, I have a smart kid, and I have the means to meet our needs.  READ MORE

Engagement Stories, Cuddling, and Wonderful Boyfriends

1. I’ve never met anyone with whom I have half as much in common as my boyfriend of two years. We agree on the big issues — kids, money, life goals — plus most little ones — best dog breed, TV/movie preferences. We attended school together from elementary through high school (different social circles) and then got the same degree. We’re excited about marriage. He accepts my biggest flaws and I accept his. I love him with my entire heart, and I’d do anything for him. READ MORE