Yes, I know - I am the worst. But I'll still be purchasing your book, if that's any consolation.
On "When the female finally got dressed, she attempted to put a cheeseburger on her foot as if it were a sandal"
I'm particularly impressed by the original article's use of the subjunctive mood.
@olivebee: There is a huge drawback to this plan though - you will be flying Southwest.
@Ophelia: "No, no, no. Not like that, Judy. 'Blow' is just an expression..."
@KeLynn: In my family, none of us like to sit with our backs to windows, due to the danger of being shot by snipers.
@Countess Maritza: Are those two options different?
Bedroom? But my computer is in the living room. Other than that, just need a chair and some tissues...
"You better bite it."
"Oh, it's already been bitten!"
I actually really liked Chris Cornell's "You Know My Name" from Casino Royale. But here's a rather great "should have been" with Shirley Bassey's "Living Tree" played over the opening credits. Totally works.