On Crushes on Professors and "How Can I Tell If I'm Boring?"

@apotentiallyboringperson hi! I have struggled with this same issue in the past- always worrying that I am boring and everyone else is more interesting/funnier. A couple thoughts. One, who you hang round with makes a difference. I felt most insecure when i hung around a crowd whose conversations revolved around inside jokes, obscure references, and a lot of judging/mocking people not in the group. In those situations i didnt get the inside jokes and references, felt like I didn't have anything funny to add, was scared of being the subject of their mockery, and generally felt like I was boring. I eventually stopped hanging around them. I found newer, more interesting (to me) people whose conversations weren't all inside jokes but talked about news, books, internet stuff, things I care about - and i realized in those situations i thrive, i have lots to add, and i never have to worry that I'm boring. So, surrounding yourself with the right people helps!

Also you sound like you are a fascinating person (I would love to know your secret for having the energy to do so much and go out 6 nights a week!) so to some degree it's just working on expressing those opinions and silencing your inner critic - having opinions and passions, which you clearly have both of, already makes you the opposite of boring.

(Unrelated: someone i know recently was talking about a girl he described as 'blah' and he called me 'the opposite of blah' - which, after years of wondering if I was boring, I took as the highest form of compliment.)

Posted on November 10, 2012 at 9:43 am 2

On Crushes on Professors and "How Can I Tell If I'm Boring?"

@melis six nights is insane. I also have fomo and like to go out but any more than 3 or 4 would be exhausting. Still need at least 1-2 nights a week for sweatpants, cooking, wine, an reruns by myself.

Posted on November 10, 2012 at 9:30 am 1

On Loaner Shirts, Neon Books, and the Meanings of Sleazy

Finally! WHERE has Ask a Dude been all these months??

Posted on October 2, 2012 at 5:01 pm 0

On Jealousy Mutations and the 2.5 Days Game

@baklava! i think the guys definitely love the attention! i also think sometimes it is the "nice guy" complex that leads them to insist they can't cut the girl off because it would be too mean/ hurt her feelings if she's in love with them.

Posted on September 24, 2012 at 11:07 pm 1

On Jealousy Mutations and the 2.5 Days Game

@baklava! I am so glad you wrote this. I am in a very similar situation - BF is still good friends with his ex, who he dated on and off for about 2 yrs, before he dated me. I have no issue with his other friends who are girls but I have seen clear signs (again, too many little things to list them all out) that she's not over him.

I do know that he's not interested in her anymore, he loves me, without a doubt. But it still drives me crazy that he is friends with his ex who is still into him. And I still feel threatened by her. I have tried expressing this to him - ie. asking him why they still communicate so much (email / IM pretty much daily) and he just gets frustrated and I wonder if I'm being reasonable or just paranoid...

Posted on September 24, 2012 at 1:31 pm 0

On How Cosmo Conquered the World

I hate Cosmo but I am an edith fangirl so I will def be reading this.

Posted on August 3, 2012 at 1:19 pm 1

On Ask an Indelicate Question: How Are You Doing It Every 28 Days or So?

@Third Wave Housewife can you explain why stay on top? I'm always afraid of being on top during period sex... maybe its silly but I feel like it's tempting gravity and MORE blood will fall out of me at that angle.

Posted on March 9, 2012 at 12:56 pm 0

On Escaping, Tipping, and Moving Forward

@JessicaLovejoy Also if you rarely have cash on you, and you didn't know there would be an attendant, you sort of feel like an idiot/ jerk when that happens.

Posted on February 10, 2012 at 2:30 pm 8

On Escaping, Tipping, and Moving Forward

@Tuna Surprise agreed. I wholeheartedly support not taking loans for undergrad if you can, and moving to the East Coast after college, debt free!

Posted on February 10, 2012 at 2:29 pm 0

On Escaping, Tipping, and Moving Forward

LW3: I have been you! I wanted desperately to get away from my midwestern hometown and go to college on the East Coast and start a new life. But it was too expensive. So I went to a state school, because my parents would pay for it in full. It certainly wasn't my dream and for a while I did feel like I missed out on a chance to start my new life.

But I stuck it out and the best part was when I graduated, I DID move to the East Coast. I got a job in my dream city on the East Coast and because I went to a state school, I had zero student loan debt. I've been on the East Coast since then and couldn't be happier. I still got the opportunity I wanted to move to the East Coast and start fresh -- and I got to do it with no student loan debt. So I know it's hard now, but I promise you can still do it after college and doing it with no debt is even better. If it helps, graduate in 3 years - I took classes over the summer so I could get out of college and move away a year sooner.

Good luck!

Posted on February 10, 2012 at 2:28 pm 5