Quantcast

On Interview With a Nutria

@flanhoodles:

Let's see. I think he can have cow, pig, chicken, lamb, . . .

Posted on July 6, 2012 at 2:40 pm 2

On My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy Man

But nice guys finnish LAST. Think about that.

Posted on July 5, 2012 at 7:06 pm 1

On Elderly Dogs and Babies: A Primer

When we had our first kid, our two middle aged cats moved to grandmas. Because for the first six weeks we had to feed our daughter every three hours, 24/7, and my wife was pumping so I had the bottle much of the time, and it took her an hour to eat. Sooooo, finish a feeding at 10pm and ask yourself: "Do I sleep until the midnight feeding, or do I just keep drinking?" Actually, I never asked that, the answer is SO obvious. But with all that I didn't have much left for the cats, and grandma's is extremely cat-wonderful, and it was good all around.

Posted on May 21, 2012 at 6:24 pm 1

On Is That a Cluster of Grapes in Your Pocket or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

Oh, so "G" stands for "God that is HARD. TO. FIND." Although, of course, I know EXACTLY where it is and how best to access it.

Posted on April 26, 2012 at 6:47 pm 0

On Iceberg the White Killer Whale

@Edith Zimmerman:

Edith!!!

Of course, it doesn't know if it's healthy and normal because it's healthy and normal, or if that's just the wish doing its job. Also, it drinks 50 gallons of Wild Turkey every night.

Posted on April 23, 2012 at 8:27 pm 2

On Iceberg the White Killer Whale

@Sailor Jupiter:

Even so I expect more..

Posted on April 23, 2012 at 8:21 pm 0

On Iceberg the White Killer Whale

Edith! Do you even read the articles!?!

"It appears to be healthy and leading a normal life in its pod."

Sure, facts do take away from he drama, but ...

Bottom line, it appears to be healthy and normal.

Posted on April 23, 2012 at 6:53 pm 1

On Iceberg the White Killer Whale

@Sailor Jupiter:

You're the fucking sailor, you tell us!

Posted on April 23, 2012 at 6:50 pm 0

On Women I Daydream About Being While Taking Long Showers

@Nicole Cliffe

It's got potential. Is Dustin Hoffman's wife a looker? And can I give it a happy ending?

Posted on April 12, 2012 at 7:10 pm 0

On Women I Daydream About Being While Taking Long Showers

Boy, you're long shower thoughts and my long shower thoughts parted ways about the time humans and apes parted evolutionary ways. In this analogy, I take the ape line.

Posted on April 12, 2012 at 6:46 pm 0