Really? It sure sounds like you've never been in the 'wife's' shoes, Hero. Ideally, your spouse is your number one, your best friend – as A Lady says, they're the first person you're genuinely excited to tell everyone to, etc. Let's say your wife gives you the ultimatum, and you give up your friend. If you really don't understand the wondering and the anxiety your wife must have been feeling, and likely the shame and anger accompanying having to give it in the first place – and if you'd really be plunged into misery, if a fledgling friendship with a coworker really was such a staggering loss – then you're probably married to the wrong person, to say the least.