This is everything that I look for in a service piece. Thank you!
@ejcsanfran That is the only correct answer! Well done.
@deglatitude Oooh I know, that too. I resent what she did to the word lovely. @Zidaane I was kind of surprised by the lack of camel toe! I thought there would be more. It's like she has a smooth plastic barbie vagina.
@janedonuts Well, we know it's different from an irregular alien man size.
@piekin The phrase "regular human woman size" was so awkward and awful to me. I truly have no idea what that would be in the author's mind.
So far I truly do not like it. It just seems so aggressive and angry. The piece about wearing that nude bodysuit (yes, ridiculous) seems to actually just be about the fact that the author is hot and slender.
"I knew for sure a regular human woman size would not fit me properly because I’m so petite that regular human woman size clothing, period, doesn’t fit me properly." And:
"I felt awesome as a 33-year-old who was just broken up with, knowing without a doubt that yes, I have a sizzling little body (that bit of enhancement doesn’t count!) and that people do notice me."
And also the number of days before a subtitle contained the words "because I hate men"? One.
I think you have been (and I'm sure will continue to be) real, real funny.
This is 6.02 times 10 to the 23rd kinds of amazing. I think about Jay and Beyonce a lot. They are America's royal couple.
I got really drunk at a strip club in san francisco and on our way out decided the best place to pee would be basically on the tire of the car next to ours. The car started to back up when I was mid-pee so I fell back on my butt, giggling wildly. I then got back into the car with my friends, still laughing, and barely managed to get out that i had 'a secret.' They knew what it was