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On Nice to Meet You, Internet

I am into yoga, new wave, lipstick and knitting. My house is filthy, and will remain so until my husband learns to clean...

Posted on August 15, 2013 at 2:06 pm 3

On Paper Trail, Papier Mashups: The Art of Quilling

I accidentally ordered a huge amount of quilling paper from Amazon (when I meant to order oragami paper)! I found a use for it; Martha Stewart suggested writing your vows on it and unrolling them. We did it, it was a beautiful, but terribly impractical idea.

Posted on July 30, 2013 at 4:11 pm 0

On Dresses Considered by Scarlett O'Hara for the Twelve Oaks Barbecue

I don't know why she didn't just go with the green taffeta. Also HOW DOES SHE ONLY HAVE LIKE 4 DRESSES - THIS LIST SHOULD BE MUCH LONGER.

Posted on July 29, 2013 at 4:53 pm 2

On D.I.-Why?: Emily Matchar on the Allure of the “New Domesticity”

@Lili B. Isn't that sort of the point of her though? That her exceptional talent is to be shiny-headed and straight-backed and able to put up with the public portion of it? I mean - I find it difficult to believe that after Princess Diana was literally KILLED BY PAPS that anyone would pretend they don't know what they're getting into? I think she signed up for it, and that's her special skill. She can handle it. And that's probably why Will married her - because she convinced him she really, really would be okay with all that it entailed.

Edited to add: I guess I mean I HOPE that's her special skill - like Harry Potter's mom, giving some kind of ancient protection to her child or Bella turning into a super protective vampire mom. I just, I hope it all rolls off her back and she loves more of the "job" than she hates.

Posted on July 22, 2013 at 2:20 pm 7

On Everything I Know About Fertility I Learned From the Year 1670

@supernintendochalmers Refreshingly, my midwife, who is my age (35) told me she was waiting, b/c she "knows what she's in for" and many of her friends were surprised and not really ready. I found this comforting.

Posted on June 20, 2013 at 2:20 pm 4

On Everything I Know About Fertility I Learned From the Year 1670

I just had to go cry in the bathroom about this article. GOD DAMN IT.

Posted on June 20, 2013 at 2:19 pm 0

On "What's the Worst Thing That's Woken You Up in the Dead of Night?"

@Jocasta Carr You mispelled "8-legged cockroach sense".

Posted on June 12, 2013 at 4:24 pm 0

On "What's the Worst Thing That's Woken You Up in the Dead of Night?"

Okay, this isn't exactly "waking up" but, rather sobering up? I had been out drinking (heavily) after a (horrific) break up, and returned home to my (hellishly cold, spider infested) Chicago coachhouse where I lived (newly) alone. I washed my face, dried it with a hand towel, and turned my face to the left and examined my right eyebrow in mirror, then, turned my face to the right, to reveal the left side of my face in the mirror and A HUGE SPIDER THAT HAD BEEN THERE FOR THE AMOUNT OF TIME I HAD BEEN EXAMINING THE OTHER SIDE OF MY FACE! I actually punched myself in the face, so hard I saw stars (and gave myself a black eye), ran into the bedroom, jumped on the bed and tore off my shirt while screaming and battering myself about the head and neck. No joke. I slept in the (upstairs) living room until my black eye healed. And yes, it did sober me up...

Posted on June 12, 2013 at 3:49 pm 9

On What Is a "Water Fountain"

You know what else they've left out? The addition of a completely unnecessary "the" to specific types of stores - mostly of a grocery variety. This is a Chicago thing - NO ONE goes to "Jewel" only to THE jewel. I now also go to THE target, THE Dominicks, etc. When I'm at my mom's house I also go to THE Kroger - and my mother never fails to be confused.

Posted on June 6, 2013 at 3:05 pm 2

On Hey, Brother.

The best "Hey Brother" is "Sister's my new mother, Mother!"

Posted on May 20, 2013 at 10:04 pm 0