Thank you for writing this. Thank you for, "We wait for the victims of abuse to be the ones to take power away from their abusers, instead of working actively to ensure that these motherfuckers never get that far in the first place."
I know it sounds trite, but this sentence, among all your many powerful and persuasive sentences, is a real game-changer for me.
@SarahHyphen: Okay, now I know why this nightmare song has been playing on Canadian radio for what feels like FOREVER and is just hitting American ears now - CanCon that managed to insinuate its way across the border.
Sorry, America - but we did give you Tegan and Sara so maybe that makes things better?
On Interview with Dr. Susan Robinson, One of the Last Four Doctors in America to Openly Provide Third-Trimester Abortions
@Masha Bean@facebook: Oh, hi, Masha, I thought I'd introduce you to someone you may have met - he said some really cool things!
“Do not judge, or you too will be judged.For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?"
... But, by the way you talk, I'm not sure you've met this Jesus. It's very, very easy to judge, and much harder to show true compassion - that's the difference between the Pharisees and Jesus.
You might try reading Matthew 23, as well; I'm sure you have a Bible handy somewhere in your house.
@kierkegaardsbro: thank you. You may be the first person who hasn't slowly backed away while smiling nervously when I get all enthusiastic about jellies. (I found a moon jelly once with seven gonads! You can't even make stuff like that up!)
@Bittersweet: Are you sure it was a moon jelly sting? Although moon jellies have nematocysts, (stinger cells with tiny spring-loaded harpoons)they're too weak to pierce human skin. If the stings felt more like wasp stings or electric shocks, my best guess would be a Lion's Mane jelly - they have very very long, almost-invisible tentacles. The Lion's Mane jellies are real jerks - stinging at long distance, and letting the poor moon jellies take the blame.
There's so much we don't know about jellies! I live in a nothing-going-on place very near the ocean, so I've taken up observing jellies as a hobby. The populations vary from year-to-year: last year there were very few jellies, this year there are more than I've ever seen before. (I do a dead sea-blubber count in early September, mostly to assure myself there is a cycle of ups and downs, rather than a steady expansion every year) But here's the crazy part - we live on the east coast of Vancouver Island and we get these stupid jellies every year. Just across Georgia Strait, in Vancouver... No jellies. It runs counter to all the theories of what jellyfish love! They're supposed to like pollution, and man-made underwater structures, and yet they ignore the juicy coliform-rich waters of False Creek and hang out here. (I think they follow the sun, but I can't prove it.)
@emmycantbemeeko: Okay, I have noticed that you have talked a lot about acclimating kids to dogs, but you only briefly mentioned acclimating dogs to kids.
You know what be helpful?
You know what would be really helpful?
People teaching their dogs how to behave.
Instead of having to debrief my child about her 'inappropriate' terror when that giant dog jumped up on her again and again, how about that dog's owner take some responsibility for training their dog not to jump (I don't care if the dog is high-spirited, full of joy, or 'just wants to make friends') on strangers? Instead of my daughter crossing over to the other side of the street when she comes to the house with the rottweiler barking and barking and barking as it presses up close to the fence, how about those people train their dog to not bark at EVERY SINGLE PERSON who walks by?
In my neighbourhood, there are some friendly, well-trained dogs, and I make a point of praising their behaviour and being friendly in return, as an example to my daughter. There are also some dogs that are hostile and poorly-trained, and owners who are lazy and sometimes complete jerks, and I honestly believe it is their job to train those dogs or keep them in their well-fenced yards or leashed when they go for walks.
tl;dr - Train dogs not to be aggressive and inappropriate, and then I won't need to talk my child out of being afraid of dogs. my child won't be afraid anymore.
@emmycantbemeeko: My daughter had some terrifying encounters with hostile dogs when she was small, including one Samoyed in our condo building that used to lunge and snap at her face when she was strapped into her stroller. (The worst encounters were on the elevator - the doors would open and that dog would be right there, snapping and growling.) She's had other encounters, including one with a very hostile Rottweiler that escaped from its home.
It's not lack of exposure to dogs that has made my daughter afraid of dogs - it's exposure to poorly-trained and outright hostile dogs.
Some dogs might "literally live to please people", but please remember that almost everyone who is afraid of dogs has encountered members of the species that growl and lunge and even bite. Their fear isn't 'sad' or pathetic - it's self-preservation.
I heard some of this interview yesterday while I was driving around, and - Okay, there's this person I know, and she's awful. She's a bragger, a boaster, a sly-digger, an outright insulter, the kind of person you can never contradict no matter how wrong and nasty she is because she'll escalate it and just get meaner and shoutier and everyone is just staring at their hands or the table because she'll only stop shouting if everyone else retreats far, far away. (We're in a couple of things together, unavoidable things)
And she's from Saskatchewan, and she sounds like Joni Mitchell, and they both talk about Saskatchewan, and I cannot listen to Joni Mitchell talk about anything anymore because of this person, this awful, awful person.
I'm also pretty sure I can never go to Saskatchewan again, either.
@SuperGogo: I dunno - there's that truly morbid song about the calf - the final verse goes:
Calves are easily bound and slaughtered,
Never knowing the reason why,
But all those who treasure freedom
Like the swallow can learn to fly.
We LOVED that song at Camp Columbia!