By I'm Right on Top of that, Rose on 10 Years, Actually: Harry & Karen, David & Natalie, John & Judy
@mabellegueule Would you say you Love(d), Actually these posts?
By queenofbithynia on "The digital porn guy wants a fantasy that doesn’t exist, but the postfeminist girl wants one as well"
This supposed bind that men are in, from the last quoted paragraph, is nothing like the virgin/whore complex, which has sort of diffused all over the place in common usage but still means one of two basic things: either, A, men want a woman to be one or the other of those things, there are two kinds of women, you have to be one of them and you can't be both, or, B, you CAN be both at once and indeed have to be, because the knowledge that you are performing an uncomfortable role for a man is his primary erotic motivator and expecting you to be two contradictory things at once ensures that you are always in the wrong, which is the primary function of paradoxical female archetypes in the public imagination.
So this bears no similarity to the male dichotomy that's posited, because the thing about the virgin/whore thing is both roles appeal to the same audience -- men -- and even both to the same man, very possibly, consecutively or concurrently.
Whereas these dual roles for men, nice human being and horrible fuck, are not two sides of the same coin in that way -- only one of them is something that women as a faceless mass expect or desire (and it isn't an unattainable fantasy role, either, for that matter.) The other one is an image sold to men only, not sold to women as something they are entitled to find. It is what men are told that they want, not what they are told women want from them. You could say this is more insidious but it definitely isn't the same issue. Two different sets of people wanting two different sets of things from you is not an insoluble dilemma; it isn't even a dilemma.
By fondue with cheddar on Protect Yourself from Specious Zoo Fraud by Perusing These Majestic Photos of the Serengeti Lion
...not as surprised as the people who thought they were adopting a Tibetan mastiff as a pet.
"'Real women’s empowerment is being able to do what you want to when you want to.'"
And if you try so very, very hard, and do everything exactly right, and make perfect choices, eventually you will have a perfect life, free of conflicts and anxieties and the nagging feeling that if you had just done it right, been a little more accommodating or a little less accommodating or nicer or meaner or in better shape or less concerned about your body or more dedicated to your job or more focused on your home life, everything would have just snapped into place and you would be content now.
And if you don't have that life, it's your fault, because you have CHOICES, can't you see that, and if you had made the right ones you would have transcended human imperfection by now.
"Many of the women I spoke with were troubled by the gender-role traditionalism that crept into their marriages once they gave up work"
I mean...fucking duh? So I know we should not be engaging any of this blather, but I CAN'T SEEM TO HELP IT, SO...I mean, DUH, ALL OF THE DUHS, right? Your husband makes the money, you stay home with the brats and you're surprised there's "gender-role traditionalism" all of a sudden? On what planet do you spend most of your time?
@ladypants Your phone. Just eat your phone.
@Todd@twitter Did we have the same instructor? Mine told us that we need to embrace being "wicked chill."
@Emby Hoop + Stick + Hole = Infinite Playtime Possibilities
ETA: Reading it back...that sounds really really inappropriate.
@MilesofMountains I mean, Tommen named his cat Ser Pounce, so I don't know how he could possibly be bad.
I would totally watch a teen drama set in the Xavier Institute.
You know that feeling where you didn't know you needed something until suddenly YOU KNOW YOU NEED A THING?
I have that feeling right now.