Aghhhh well guys, it's the weekend and once again, my borderline friend has seemingly got back in a not-great headspace. This time, by initiating contact but not responding to my emails. Aghhhh! Bloodrocuted, your advice last week was great but I feel like I don't know how to apply it to this particular situation. Aghhhh...
I will cansplain the shit outta everyone.
Wow, your uncle is the coolest. Also, although I'm sad he lost a lot of his community, I'm really glad that he's still around to tell us about his life.
Thank you so much! this is very helpful to me! Hopefully I'll be able to follow through on this without a huge or horrible falling-out.
Thank you! Your words give me some hope. I realize that personality disorders are in some ways more serious than mood disorders/other mental illnesses. I really want my friend to get help; the only thing is that with him, he tries so many things to feel better, to change, to improve, but they never work. Also, he seems to feel ALL the shame/self-loathing. So these factors together make me think he won't seek DBT. Hopefully I can find a way to get him into it. Also, I hope I can find a way to be like, "Yo, that thing you did? I don't condone it." (It's really important to me that we have this conversation.) Part of me says that he's decided he's done with our friendship, and only kind of keeps me around when he needs validation/reassurance. UGH.
Wow, that is...terrible. Your grandmother sounds a lot like my family member with BPD. (The other person I know is younger, and nicer, and smarter, so I have some hope for them.) Ughhhh. So your grandmother never tried dialectical therapy, I'm guessing? I wish I knew how to communicate successfully with my BPD friend (note: my communication skills in general suck.) Because honestly, there is so much potential for my friend to improve.
Yes, I do (altho maybe more specific than academic? If that makes sense.) I've done a fair amount of reading on the theme. What I'm wondering is how to have a sort of difficult conversation with someone I know with BPD. Essentially, altho. I want them back in my life, they recently did something really really not ethical. I basically want to be like, "yo, let's be in each other's lives again. Errr...that said, that thing you did? Not cool." However, I don't want to start the unproductive spiral of self-hate and shame. I know about SET and some of the communication techniques, but I'm still not sure how to phrase my statement. Err....wise pinners, any ideas!
Thanks for the responses, everyone! I'm talking about borderline personality disorder. Two people in my immediate circle have it (although one also has NPD, which is no cakewalk.) I just want to know what everyone's experiences have been, basically, and to see if anyone's had luck with getting someone to try dialectical behavioural therapy.
Posting for the first time to ask if anyone here has experience with loved ones who have been diagnosed with bpd. Or, alternatively, if you have been diagnosed with it and could give me an idea of what it is like. Many thanks for your generosity/courage/frankness!