Who dat is?

On R.I.P. Malls

I work in commercial property management. This is why the company I work for only buys and manages outdoor shopping centers, because for some reason, those are becoming the preferred shopping center. What we used to refer to as "strip malls" are taking over... it's bizarre.

Posted on October 10, 2014 at 4:07 pm 0

On When You're Unemployed

This couldn't have come at a better time. How much worse is it when you accidentally overhear the conversation about the thing you did that's about to most likely get you fired? Even more so, how do you spin it when you're out there on the job hunt so you don't look like an unemployable loser? Plz halp.

Posted on June 23, 2014 at 8:29 pm 0

On Future Islands, "Seasons (Waiting On You)"

I'm going to fangirl for a second and say that I stood right next to Sam Herring for a good portion of Wye Oak's performance at their show in Chattanooga a couple of weeks ago and he is actually SO handsome in person and I could hardly contain myself.

Posted on March 21, 2014 at 2:48 pm 0

On Ask Baba Yaga: All I Can Think About Is Getting Married

This column makes the baby Jesus cry. Or I'm just an asshole. Or both.

Posted on July 23, 2013 at 1:01 pm 0

On A Brief Introduction

@Bittersweet Bah!

Posted on May 16, 2013 at 9:42 am 0

On A Brief Introduction

@par_parenthese I think regardless of the outcome Chevy Chase is the one who needs to get killed. He WAS kind of hot, but seeing him on Community kind of erases all of that from my mind. Yikes!

Posted on May 16, 2013 at 9:42 am 0

On A Brief Introduction

Can we bring back the Marry/Fuck/Kill column? AMIRITE?

Posted on May 15, 2013 at 1:23 pm 10

On "That's Entertainment," The Jam

I think Nicole and I have the same taste in music.

Posted on April 9, 2013 at 3:10 pm 0

On Thora Birch's Nine Best 90s Movies

A lot of Now and Then was filmed in my hometown of Statesboro, Georgia and ALL THE KIDS my age got to be extras in this big carnival scene and my mom would NOT let me go and I was SO. MAD. But then the carnival scene wasn't in the movie, so HA HA.

Posted on April 4, 2013 at 2:24 pm 4

On Ask a Clueless Lady

Hi everyone! It is I, Broke Face. Thank you for all the kind words! First off, no, I was not wearing a helmet. I KNOW. I have one, and it sits in my closet, and I am a horrible person. However, as someone mentioned, the helmet wouldn't have prevented any of my injuries because it was my cheek that hit the pavement first. However, I think now that I know how vile a head injury can be (despite my having fallen off that death trap numerous times before), I may actually wear it.

GOOD NEWS, though. I slathered all my wounds with Bacitracin and they have now all healed. Seriously, that stuff is magic; they were gone A WEEK later. My face is a little discolored, but that will go away. In terms of "owning it," I went out to a few familiar places where people knew what had happened to me, and all was well. I got a few free drinks out of it. The two scars on my lip where I had stitches are already looking better. My teeth (currently held in place with a splint) are another story, but they're a work in progress.

And now you know my life story. But seriously, thank you, A (Not-So) Clueless Lady, for including me up in here.

Posted on April 2, 2013 at 6:57 pm 20