On Friday Open Thread

@roadtrips @cawendaw Thank you both for the advice, I really appreciate it. I think that I'll talk to him about it again and set a deadline of "if we don't figure out a better way to deal with this then we need to take a break", and see what he says. I really do appreciate you taking the time to reply and I'm sorry if I seem like an ungrateful little wretch for not taking the advice you've given. I really appreciate having the wise people of the hairpin to ask for advice because there aren't a lot of people people I know irl that I can go to for advice about this sort of thing. Also, thank you for the cute gifs, cat tumblrs, and short story suggestions.

Posted on July 26, 2013 at 7:02 pm 0

On Friday Open Thread

@Cawendaw I tried to Rey to this twice but it disappeared both times, but what I tried so futilely to say is that I did spend some time apart and after we reconciled the goddamn feelings returned.

Posted on July 26, 2013 at 6:16 pm 0

On Friday Open Thread

Damn, I typed out a really long comment explaining the situation, but the. It like, erased itself? The short version is that at one point, because of some dramam we didn't talk for almost a year, and then we reconciled and became friends again in December, at which point the FEELINGS reappeared. Stupid feelings.

Also, I might go on an unrequited love story binge for a bit, but I don't know if it would help. Suggestions for reading or viewing material would be appreciated. I don't have Netflix, but I can probably figure something out.

Posted on July 26, 2013 at 6:00 pm 0

On Friday Open Thread

I'm in pathetic puppy dog level love with someone who I've been somewhat to very hung up on for 2 years now, and I feel like a total loser. He has made it clear that he doesn't want a relationship right now, which is fine, and I do my best to respect that, but sometimes it's really hard, because he is also my best friend (I'm really bad at making friends) so we spend tons of time together and I love it and hanging out with him makes me super happy, which there is not a whole lot of in my life right now, but sometimes I miss physical affection too much and basically end up throwing myself at him. He's always really sweet and understanding, but I don't know what to do. The best solution would be magical feelings removal so we can just be friends and everything would be okay, but that isn't a thing. Should be, but it isn't. I don't even know what I'm really asking for from the thread, but I wanted to talk about it, and maybe get some advice, I guess. I really want to stay friends with him because he is an amazing person and I love him, but I also LOVR him and it can be really painful and confusing sometimes.

Tl;dr I'm having friendship/ romance troubles and want advice/ comfort/ gifs of cute animals.

Posted on July 26, 2013 at 5:09 pm 0

On Lesbian Vocabulary, U-Hauls, and the Family That Comes Out Together

@megmurray Gender is a socially constructed set of expectations for peoples' behavior, appearance and the like based on their biological sexes. Gender identities in turn are based on those same social constructs. From my experiences with people that identify as genderqueer, agender, etc, they assume those identities because they don't fit into the binarist expectations for their sex, and because they've accepted and internalised the idea that our culture's (rather fucked up) gender expectations, they then assume that it is outside the norm to deviate from the binary, and so feel that try have to create or adopt a new gender identity, when it would be healthier for our culture to reject binarist notions of gender altogether. I don't f that helps at all, and is obviously just my opinion, but it's another perspective, which might help you sort things a bit better? Maybe/ hopefully?

Posted on July 24, 2013 at 11:18 pm 0

On A Brief Addendum to Our Craigslist Wedding Story

@Citizen Christy Wait, I googled them and I still don't really get it? Is it more than the phonetic resemblance to the phrase "my kitten" or am I missing something?

Posted on June 14, 2013 at 10:32 pm 0

On The Natural Beauty and Cosmetics Advocate: Jessa Blades

@TARDIStime Honestly, so much about chemicals is bullshit anyway. Anything that is not marketed and labelled as a drug cannot really penetrate the skin enough to actually cause problems. (See this blog postby the fabulous Rowena which talks about it at greater length) Besdies, Blueberries have parabens and Sodium Lauryl Sulfate is derived from coconut oil, but we're still being told to eat blueberries because they have antioxidants and to use coconut oil as a moisturiser or wash our faces with it.
Also, not to be terrible and crush your ideals, but cruelty free practices are mostly marketing. The reality is most places will just use ingredients that have been tested previously, meaning that they're still benefiting from animal testing, they're just not the ones paying for it. Either that or they outsource the testing to labs and then get away with saying that they don't do it. (again, Rowena talks about it more in depth here)

Posted on February 13, 2013 at 12:30 am 0

On Name That Book!

@EKPinc @squishycat I'm pretty sure that's it, I'd probably have to read it to be 100% positive but it seems right.
@clarezebell That's totally it!
Thank you all so much, I've been half remembering these for years (which is odd seeing as I'm not that old but whatevs) and it was so frustrating that I couldn't remember.

Just kidding, I found the third one I had mentioned. It was Cinderellis and the Glass Hill by Gail Carson Levine.

Posted on February 8, 2013 at 5:31 pm 0

On Name That Book!

Okay, there was one that was a fantasy novel and there was a boy and a girl who were travelling together. At one point the girl falls asleep sitting down (or curled into a ball, I don't remember which all I remember is she slept weirdly) and the boy made fun of her for it. I have vague memories of a donkey and a chicken and the name Arcadia?

There was another one where there was a girl and then a strange girl joined her class but she dressed weirdly like an elf? Naturally they became friends and the new girl had to take care of her sick mother and she wanted her friend to help her, but she also made her believe in elves and they did stuff like build homes for them? And the first girl had gone grocery shopping to buy food for the girl with the sick mom and she didn't have enough money so she stole some Bologna. And then at the end of the story there was no sick mother and the new girl had been the elves and it was really weird and made very little sense.

Posted on February 8, 2013 at 2:51 pm 0

On Friday Open Thread

@luna848 If you want to do unnatural colors, it would be super easy since your hair is already bleached, but I would suggest maybe starting with something like dying the tips or just your fringe or a few smallish streaks at first. If you dye them purple it will have the benefit of helping to keep the rest of your hair toned white too, which might help because you seem to be attached to having white hair? I just wouldn't suggest dying your whole head one really bright color suddenly because you kind of have to get used to strangers being a bit rude about it. By which I don't mean that they would insult you or something, just comments and asking if it fried your hair, asking if they could touch it, the like. At least that was how my personal experience went, as someone who had blue/pink/red/rainbow hair for almost three years now. Also, sometimes bright colors can stain your hair quite badly, like, lasting for months after you stop dying, so you might want to stick to lighter, cooler colors at first so you can see if you like it so you don't end up stuck with a head of fire engine red hair that you can't get rid of.

Posted on February 1, 2013 at 7:38 pm 0