@missupright MEEEEEE TOOOOOOOOOOOOO
"I had rented a herd of goats for reasons that aren’t relevant here"
I BEG TO DIFFER.
@VerityStandingStill I got prude and slut at that age too!! Which was crazy because a) I had kissed exactly two boys, and they were pecks, and b) I really really liked boys and would happily have gone farther than that, I was just terrified to. From that point on gossip just seemed really stupid and pointless to me.
Apropos of nothing, I want Tom Lehrer to write a song about this book.
2 4 6 8, Witches Prestidigitate!
@Emby ARE YOU LISTENING, FIFTEENTH-CENTURY HUSBANDS?
@JanieS WHERE THE FUCK IS FAITHFUL COMMENTER NEVILLE LONGBOTTOM WE NEED HIM AND HIS SWORD NEVILLE LONGBOTTOM PLEASE REPORT TO THE DARK ARTS THREAD
(ETA: I'm pretty sure Pin!Neville is actually a lady but it's a character, come on.)
@Briony Fields Dude, that is the worst when health professionals assume you're totally incompetent. I understand that they have to check their little boxes, but if they would at least acknowledge it, like, "OK, since this has been going on so long, I'm going to assume that you've done all the normal things like cutting out caffeine and exercising and eating well and having good sleep practices. Right? OK. Let's run through the second tier possibilities really quickly -- anxiety? stress? depression? do you feel safe at home? etc. -- and then we can discuss how we can address this together."
@karenb A friend of mine is obsessed with two-phase sleeping! He's convinced that we need to re-structure our whole society around two-phase sleeping + siestas.
@packedsuitcase I need to high five you.
"Are You Bikini Ready? 12 Fat-Blasting Moves To Give You That Sexy Waist He'll Love"
"What's Your OQ (Orgasm Quotient)?"
"Should YOU Be Doing More To Keep The Mystery Alive?"
17 Brand-New, Scorching-Hot Sex Tips!"
"What Guys REALLY Want In Bed"
"True Confessions: I Lie About My 'Number'"
"Best Makeup Tricks For Irresistible Eyes, Beautiful Brows, And A Perfect Pout"
"36 Outfits Sure To Get HIM To Notice You"
I could do this all day.
@elissa_what? Oh meeeeee toooooo on this one. It's like my body has a daily productivity (I say "productivity" but basically anything other than reading the entire internet counts as productivity) quota, and if I don't get through it before 11, then by george, I will begin being productive AT 11.