On Ask a Fancy Person: Consignment Shops, Gendered Pronouns and Leaving the Forever 21 Zone

For office clothes, I loooove suit-dresses. One piece and you are done. Pair with a blazer or cardigan if you want for a bit of extra fanciness (and warms), an appropriate color heel, and you're good to go. I've gotten nice ones for $3 at Goodwill, $30 on clearance at JC Penny, and $80 at New York & Co. The Goodwill one required some alteration (the vent in the back went all the way up to my bum so I sewed it shut), but yeah. Also seconding what others have said about getting 3 or so good pairs of pants and having a bunch of tops (which Goodwill is also awesome for - you might have to try on 80 to find 8 good blouses, but hey, blouses.)

Posted on July 2, 2014 at 6:29 pm 0

On You Are Entitled to One Hour, Six Minutes, and 48 Seconds of Comfort

@Roxanne Rholes I find, for me, it's the following order:

1) Flats with good support

2) 3"+ heels

3) Short heels

4) Poorly-made flats

Now... when it comes to heels, I generally am okay with spending a decent amount of money to get good quality shoes, which might be part of why that is. But I also think a lot of it is my super high arches and that my calves are pretty tight.

Posted on June 13, 2013 at 11:37 am 0

On Other People's Kids, Homes

@blueblazes I am also a non-parent, but if it's pulling on the dog's ears? Hells yes tell that kid to knock it off. I think what most of the other commenters said is stuff that I agree with. House rules, safety stuff. Minor stuff like eating breadcrusts? Let that shit slide.

I know when I was a kid (probably about 6?) I was incredibly whiny. Super whiny. My mom ignored it or would listen to it unless it was for something necessary (i.e. yes, pulling this bandaid off is going to hurt, but then it will be done. You can whine when it's done.) This one time, my sister and I both got really bad sunburns while on a family reunion. My mom was not there, and my aunt had a strict "no whining" rule... and slathered aloe on my sisters' back and my back while we criiiiied about how much it hurt, she said we were exaggerating and needed to just stop whining. Turns out... we are both allergic to aloe. It really DOES hurt and burn and sting to have it applied to a burn. Our crying? Totally legit.

Posted on May 7, 2013 at 10:54 pm 0

On Other People's Kids, Homes

@Susanna Wow. When your female friend has a baby? Because of course only moms care about these things and of course all of their friends are female and will have babies someday. Of course.

That said... I have been known to say to a very good friend with three kids "You're sick, I'm craving casserole, I can't eat a whole casserole by myself. If I can use what's in your kitchen, I'll come over and cook." Because I do love those kids, and want to have my own someday, and believe in karma. And also she fed me ALL THE TIME (apparently cooking for 6 is not much different than cooking for 5.)

Posted on May 7, 2013 at 10:24 pm 3

On "How I Stopped Eating Food"

@parallel-lines Seconding FODMAPs! I realized that most of my problems were caused by wheat... still not sure if it's a wheat intolerance or actually celiac (right now I have to eat all the wheat so that they can test later this month... it sucks. I don't end up in the ER, but my stomach is pretty much in open rebellion mode). But the other things on the list tend to work for me. Dairy actually helps to settle my stomach.

The wheat also makes my acid reflux/GERD worse. Since I know someone mentioned that, figured I'd share.

(Note: I also have Crohn's Disease, so my digestive system is hella whack.)

Posted on March 14, 2013 at 10:27 pm 0

On The Comment Section for Every Article Ever Written About Food Allergies

@Countess Maritza But I ate SO MUCH DIRT as a kid and now I am allergic to ALL THE THINGS. And Crohn's Disease. (We like to joke that my immune system got SO STRONG from eating all that dirt that now it just gets bored and starts to run drills. "Okay, boys, what do we do if we get invaded by foreign eyeballs? LET'S PRACTICE ON THE ONES WE HAVE RIGHT HERE!")

Posted on March 9, 2013 at 8:31 am 2

On The Comment Section for Every Article Ever Written About Food Allergies

@NeverOddOrEven Except for the whole "sometimes allergies are only to raw ingredients" things. For me, I can eat onions as long as they are at least a little cooked. If they are not cooked? Within about half an hour of eating one bite of a sandwich that has raw onions on it (to use a super specific example), I will be in the bathroom for the next eight hours or so. While I may not be technically traditionally allergic to jalapenos, they WILL cause a Crohn's flare (which means at least a week of being in pain, diarrhea all the time, etc., until I can get flare-up meds). So I may not get sick immediately if I eat some, but boy will it make me never come back to your restaurant if I tell the server I cannot have raw onions or jalapenos of any kind and end up in misery.

Posted on March 9, 2013 at 8:27 am 0

On Secondary Relationships, Tequila Fumes, and the Lesbian Internet

@redheaded&crazie This is why I date a lady who is also studying to be a pastry chef. PROBLEM SOLVED.

Posted on November 18, 2012 at 11:16 am 2

On A Tidy Death

Thank you.

I have always knows that I was at high risk for cancer, and earlier today they found a small bone tumor on my regular dental x-ray (The Dr said it was probably a cyst, but having looked at x-ray examples all day... it is not a cyst. Possibly a bone spur, but likely a tumor). They are not doing a biopsy, she just said that they will do x-rays every 6 months when I come in for my cleaning... but I have to admit that I am slightly terrified. But I also know that if it DOES turn out to be something terrible, I will get through it, whatever the outcome is.

Posted on November 14, 2012 at 7:25 pm 2

On The Day My Shrink Told Me to Change My Personality

@Slutface I am SO BAD at this. So bad. I am known a bit for being an ice queen - when someone plays a joke on me, I usually have a completely deadpan response, or if it's an inappropriate joke will tell them to knock it off... and then when I try to joke with people, they can never tell it apart from my "serious tiems" so then things just get awkward. I have a few close friends who I can joke with, but other than that? I really avoid it, which is a shame, because it is SUCH a bonding mechanism.

Posted on August 27, 2012 at 6:59 pm 0