Lady who aspires to lunch. NYC.
On Welcome Home
Does anyone have any tips on successfully living with their parents as an adult child?
I am moving back in with mine at the end of July, just for a brief period as I readjust to living in a different city/country. My parents are WONDERFUL, like those in this article, but they also drive me totally bananas - and I'm sure I do the same to them.
Help? Treat them like roommates? Act like the perfect daughter? What's appropriate? What's not? WHY AM I DOING THIS TO MYSELF?
@supernovice ha! i am 5'11" as well (plus .5" on a bad day, or a .75" on a good day) and maybe that makes me seem less... frail? i've also found it makes me stick out like a sore thumb.
i will say that traveling as a white woman alone, especially a blonde giant, attracts a lot of attention. but it's just attention. i've had some sticky situations, and some moments where i've felt uncomfortable, but i've never feared for my life - and the discomfort is far outweighed by the incredible experiences i've had.
@Absurd Bird i've traveled alone extensively, and it can easily be done. yes, you will be more aware than your male counterparts, and less likely to take some risks, but the world is just as open to you as it is to a man (with a very few countries the exception.)
* keep your wits about you. don't get drunk.
* stay in hostels with good reviews in safe neighborhoods.
* if it feels sketchy, leave.
* if locals tell you not to go to x neighborhood at night, don't go there.
* stick to places with women and children.
you'll be fine. many of the best experiences i've had while traveling have happened because i am a woman traveling alone, which invites the good people to open their homes and their hearts to you. a priest taking me for lunch in india, a woman sitting with me at a bus stop for an hour in greece when i got off in the wrong town... just be smart about it.
the media exists to sell papers/subscriptions/garner 'eyeballs' - and unfortunately fear is a powerful motivator. although people, including western women traveling alone, are safe in 99.99% of cases, it's the 0.01% that get the attention.
apparently we are all thinking the same thing.
so how much did he save before doing all this?
because i want. i want so bad.
Molly, thank you so much for sharing this. I relate a million times over.
I was feeling restless in my hometown, unsettled, unfulfilled - and, for many of the same reasons as you, decided to leap to another country. Now, I did it with a job, so where I ended up - NYC - wasn't quite as exotic, but it's pretty far from Vancouver in terms of lifestyle.
I wanted to live the glamourous life - work in a cool seeming industry, travel, go to all the museums and the best restaurants, and meet wonderfully interesting and exotic people - and over the past 6 months I've done all that, but it's also made me realize what I loved about home. The wild open spaces. The beaches. The dedication to lifestyle and health. The friends I grew up with, the family I love dearly. My backyard and my patio. Space. Time alone.
I'm still here for a bit, but this has helped me reconcile that it's ok if I want to go home. That I tried it, and if I don't like it, that's ok.
So, thank you.
On Shop Talk
@Sea Ermine while my fingers work WONDERFULLY i think it's also nice to switch it up. Dan Savage always espouses the importance of different techniques/pressures to men so they don't get accustomed to one type (and therefore only able to get off that way.) there are certain partnered positions where it's easier to use a small bullet vibe than attempt the full range of motion required with hands, plus you can hand the vibe to your partner.
i like lelos - specifically the longer, slightly curved g-spot ones, but there are a whole range of cheap ones that do the job just as well. i wish i could remember the name of it, but my favorite is a small blue bullet that's about $20. it only has a single speed, it's waterproof, it's got a slight bend/angle to it, and it's sold in a small clear plastic box. i think it has 'buddy' in the name. highly recommended.
the hitachi magic wand makes me go numb, but is fun for teasing play through clothing. i also don't like the mini lelo ones that look like beans - they're too slippery.
@Emby i feel like i have life plans that keep changing. i would love to do the eat, pray, love thing and hope to find The Answer to All of (My) Life Questions at the end, but i'd probably find nothing. i spent 9 months traveling south east asia and had an amazing time, and went back to my hometown and started my career... and 7 years later i want to pick up and do the same thing again. or go volunteer/work in south america. or do a master's in europe.
i want to do it all, and i'm scared i'll make the 'wrong decision' whatever i end up doing. someone remind me there are no bad decisions!
@bananalise those banana marshmallow candies. or the 'strawberry' ones, covered in the red sugar. you think they're delicious as you eat them, but they leave a weird chemical taste in your mouth.
@Reginal T. Squirge i totes had a picture of Tyson Beckford in my locker, but to me he seems like a plate of grilled chicken breasts. "healthy" but bland? or a protein shake. his identity is entwined with his ridiculous body in my mind, forever and ever.
and what about Tyrese? it's so cliche, but i can't think of anything but honey. that voice. the things he did to my loins.