@hilary12 Yeah, I was confused by the "nothing happens" part of that letter. Nothing... happens?
So uh LW4 you are definitely kidding yourself if you think you can give a blowjob in the back seat of a moving vehicle without the driver/front seat passenger knowing. If this is shit you've done before, you should be aware that the people in the front seats DEFINITELY KNEW.
@wee_ramekin Alas, poor Yorick. I knew him, Horatio. A fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy; he hath borne me on his penis a thousand times.
@MoxyCrimeFighter Cause guys NEVER do that with boobs.
"There was no possibility of a penis that day".
You know what guys hate? When you poke their flaccid penises and shriek, "Look! Look at it wiggle! Tee hee!" Who knew.
By RNL on Vigilance vs. Obsession
@packedsuitcase @fondue with cheddar
You guys! That voice is totally understandable, but it's not a loving one.
Here are some things I try to do:
1) remember that my thoughts aren't real, they are just made up ideas about how the world is. I find it helpful to think about times when I have realized that someone else has a memory of a situation that is completely different than my own. Our thoughts seem real, but THEY AREN'T! Which means you're free to choose other ones.
2) Make a commitment to never vocalize those thoughts, or at least not in a casual way. There's a HUGE difference between saying "ugh I'm so fat" to a co-worker or whatever, and saying "I'm having fear that my boyfriend doesn't like my body" to a close friend.
3) When I have a negative thought about myself think "would I say this (or think this) about somebody else? A friend?"
4) As a first step, when I'm struggling, I try to just name the thoughts, without getting rid of them. "Oh, that's a negative story I'm telling myself about my body. Ok, cool, noted."
5) When I'm feeling stronger, I try to replace the story with another thought, either related (I looked great in that dress last week, or man was that great sex I had) or unrelated (Hm, should I see a movie this week?).
6) Date dudes who like my body, buy sexy underwear, and invest in flattering lighting. But sex is a huge part of my identity, so YMMV.
Boy, this gives me a lot of feelings. As an overweight child, I definitely received lots of mixed messages from my parents and not any actual nutritional education. It wasn't until I saw a nutritionist as an adult that I understood how what I ate impacted my body. Perhaps what Bea has learned will prove to feel empowering, not embarrassing?
@iknowright There's this Love Languages book that talks about different ways people show love, and one is touch and one is acts of service. I haven't read the book or anything, but the gist rings true to me. http://www.5lovelanguages.com/
@crango I just finished Psychopath Test. So, so good. Now I'm into Moranthology by Caitlin Moran.