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On How Have You Made Yourself Proud This Year?

After years of indecision and dragging my feet, I started grad school this fall. And one of my major worries going in was that with chronic health issues maybe I wouldn't be able to keep up with assignments, but right now I've got a 4.0 gpa, which I have never had in my life. And I initially kept downplaying it that it was just professors who were easy graders; but after both professors chewing out my classes on the level of work they were doing, on assignments where I got a perfect score, I realized no, this is me doing great work.

Posted on December 5, 2014 at 7:17 pm 1

On Ask Baba Yaga: How Can I Create Stability?

Last sentence, so powerful. Lovely as usual.

Posted on November 20, 2014 at 4:03 pm 0

On The Worst Time Kris Jenner Taught Me To Make Pumpkin Bread

@Katie Walsh I was making pumpkin bread during a family Christmas, and a few people decided to help out. Unknown to me, my sister added pumpkin after I had already added it. I baked for like two hours and the inside was still raw. Yet people still ate it. I'm not sure what that says about my family.

Posted on November 5, 2014 at 5:36 pm 0

On Not That Kind of Death: An Interview With Caitlin Doughty

@LilyB There's a group photo or two of my family at my dad's funeral with the open casket. I don't love looking at them, but I understand the sentiment. In a way, it's not that much different from how the Victorians used to prop up the remains of their loved ones and get pictures taken (with and without living relatives in the photo). It's a way to try to fit in one more memory with that person, and especially at a funeral when you are probably still in shock and out of it with grief, looking back at the pictures might help some people process, or remember who was there, etc.

Posted on November 1, 2014 at 8:35 pm 0

On The Erotic Thrill of Michael Douglas

@isavedlatin And Glenn Close fought hard to have the film retain the original ending, which was Alex killing herself and framing Gallagher for her death. She felt like the crazed killer ending was a total betrayal of her character and contributed to stigmas against mental illness.

Posted on September 22, 2014 at 3:24 pm 1

On Two Victors

I'm so sorry for your loss. And glad you had the kindness of strangers who helped ease the day just a tiny bit.

Posted on August 12, 2014 at 5:13 pm 1

On How to Make 888,246 Ceramic Poppies for the Dead

The poppies start pouring out of a Tower window, making it feel even more like a sea of blood. http://www.thisiscolossal.com/2014/07/tower-of-london-poppies/

Posted on August 6, 2014 at 6:09 pm 0

On In Case of Emergency

@ratatat @Rookie, you can also do ICE (in case of emergency) in front of a contact's name to make it easy to find if someone is looking in your contact list. No reason why you couldn't designate a few contacts as ICE1, ICE2, etc in order of preferred contact.

Posted on August 1, 2014 at 10:27 pm 0

On The Big Book of Female Killers, Chapter 2: The Marquise de Brinvilliers

No charges or remorse for killing the peasants and trying to poison her serving girl? Not surprising necessarily, but still disgusting.

Posted on July 16, 2014 at 8:33 pm 0

On Falling in Love with an Asexual

As someone who is asexual, I found this piece kind of offensive. Yes, the guy was absolutely wrong about dating a teenager (which the article glossed over, as if that were the most trivial of his offenses). But I don't know that he was a big lying liar with DANGER written all over him. Should he have been honest up front and say I'm a romantic asexual and I'd like to try sex but I really don't know if it will work for me? Probably. But there are lots of big things that only an individual can gauge when they're ready to divulge in a relationship. When does one tell their partner they're trans? Or bi? Or they have low sex drive? Or they're intersex? Or they were sexually assaulted? Or that they're into a certain fetish (or BDSM)? All different situations that may come into play in a sexual relationship (or relationship in general); and I don't know that there is a right answer for when to divulge. I mean probably before you're celebrating your 15th anniversary. But do you have to share them before the first time you have sex? I don't know.
What happened to them was sad, and not really fair to either of them. But what I found offensive that almost one of the first things she asks is what his therapist says about him being asexual (subtext, clearly there's something wrong with you or you wouldn't be asexual). And then she quotes her ignorant friends who refuse to believe in his asexuality, as if what, they're experts? Finally she quotes Dan fucking Savage, who is completely utterly ignorant and awful when it comes to asexuality (not to mention his awfulness about being trans); as evidenced by his quote about not believing asexuality is a real thing. I appreciate her end paragraph, but what came before was pretty awful.

Posted on June 26, 2014 at 4:10 pm 1