By inthepost on The Zombie Apocalypse, "Shark Week," and My Great-Grandmother’s Vengeful Ghost Screams
THIS SERIES IS THE BEST
Moaning Myrtle: The very sad, very weepy ex who still sends long tortured emails months after the break up. All this after you only went on 5 dates.
The White Lady: Sends a wildly elaborate wedding invitation to your parent's address (you haven't spoken in YEARS) to make sure you know how great they are doing.
Thank god the pie charts are *circles* of statistics.
I rarely log in to comment, but this was so funny! I laughed at work, which I'm not even sure is allowed! Then I clicked over to your tumblr and that was also funny. Please write more things. I'm super glad you got to take a break from the soul-crushing anxiety of trying to live a creative life and enjoy what sounds like half vacation, half job! Wooo!
I just...this is America, huh? Everything about this makes me sick to my stomach. Thanks you for continuing to report on it - please keep it up.
By MollyBeachMurphy on Two Victors
Thank y'all! So meaningful to read these. Apologies for the desk crying!
Wedding photog here, laughing through my tears. Would love too see Mrs Brayden Wilcox's letter to her wedding photographer, which is probably like "I don't think we need a lot of formal shots, but just so we keep everything in order here's a list of 35 family groupings I definitely want. Gotta please the fam! :)" and "I know it's totally cliche and basically meaningless and that engagement rings are like totally a sexist tradition but can you just maybe put my engagement ring inside this rosebud and make sure you get at least maybe just 10 angles on that? THANKS XOXO"
"because I had been masturbating unsuccessfully with a Conair curling iron for about 2 years."
Can I just say I'm semi obsessed with the outfits here? The magenta wrap dress with vintage earrings! black wool minidress with buttons up the back!