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nonvolleyball

nonvolleyball

avid enthusiast of storytelling, humor, improvisation, games, grammar, & serendipity. also: rollercoasters, hoppy beer, cheese, & other experiences/consumables.

On "Too Many" Straight Friends, Hiding Your Sex Tools, and Life in the Queer Lane

@muddgirl yeah, but I get hives at the thought of my parents encountering an entire box of my "sex stuff."

then again, when they visited our new apartment for the first time, one of the very first thing my mother did was throw open the bedroom closet to see how big it was, so...

Posted on October 17, 2014 at 2:06 pm 0

On The Best Time I Worked At Hot Dog On A Stick

I can't hear the name of that restaurant without thinking of the Eels song "Grace Kelly Blues": "The kid in the mall works at what dog on a stick / His hat is a funny shape his heart is a brick / Taking your order he will look away / He doesn't have a thing to say." sad that that song will be anachronistic now.

also, I as well got a late-adolescent navel piercing with the help of a (slightly) older friend. sadly, my job back then was cashiering at Kohl's, & my unbreakable habit of letting merchandise slide against my stomach as I was putting it into bags didn't work well with that new accoutrement. (RIP, nonvolleyball's bellybutton ring, 2002–2002.)

Posted on October 8, 2014 at 12:00 pm 0

On Stories Like Passwords

"An abusive relationship is a closed loop. So is a professional network. So is the patriarchy."

...that floored me (& it takes a lot for a line to stand out in this generally flawless piece). thank you.

Posted on October 8, 2014 at 11:30 am 3

On Lessons My Closet Taught Me

I'll admit, I started reading this rolling my eyes a little at the description of your big closet, thinking it'd be superficial fashion porn. but it wasn't, & I'm glad I stayed--I'm a nostalgic clothes-hanger-onto too, & this was a really great read.

Posted on October 1, 2014 at 5:51 pm 0

On Carry That Weight: The Revival of Feminist Performance Art

this is amazing. I'm so impressed by Sulkowicz, & I'm grateful to have learned more about her work in its broader art-historical/activism context.

Posted on September 30, 2014 at 3:03 pm 0

On Book Titles, Answered

this is delightful. (poor Waldo.)

Posted on September 23, 2014 at 1:26 pm 0

On The Best Time I Watched My Doctor Examine My Stool Sample

@jillygagnon@twitter ohhhhhhhh my gawwwwwwwwd this was amazing & also all too real. I did hard time in the hospital after my appendix ruptured & by far the most (least) awesome part of that whole ordeal was regularly having to poop in a toilet-mounted stool-collection thingie colloquially called "the hat." I wasn't really eating solid foods either, so it was a disgusting nightmare, & I frequently had to warn people away from the bathroom because the nurses hadn't come to get it yet. #TeamShowinYerPoopToDoctors (I'm glad you're okay! & yes, antibiotics are the worst. eat yogurt.)

Posted on September 11, 2014 at 8:23 am 0

On Dumb

@kellyography not being able to talk normally is the WORST. everything you'd normally say gets evaluated w/r/t the cost/benefit of pain, & it ends up altering your whole personality. (but then again, that phenomenon gave us these comments, so yay? I'm excited about this series!)

Posted on September 9, 2014 at 9:50 am 0

On The Best Time I (Maybe) Got Rabies

this was AMAZING. did you save the Pall Mall note all these years, or is that an old photo?? (either way, it's fantastic & the decision to include it in the piece was genius.)

Posted on September 3, 2014 at 10:22 am 0

On The Yoko Ono Guide to Male Suffering

Yoko Ono is a treasure. & one of my friends who just had a baby posted this on facebook--I hope she actually does it.

Posted on July 23, 2014 at 2:04 pm 0