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By halloliebchen on Martha, Martha, Martha

"Actually, I just bought a new sun hat that goes over your riding helmet. It’s pretty ugly, but it works."

Posted on January 9, 2014 at 9:55 am 2

By Emma Carmichael on Martha, Martha, Martha

@HereKitty It is. Slide 10. I open it once a week and stare at it for five minutes. That's my #beautytip.

Posted on January 9, 2014 at 9:52 am 4

By OhMarie on Friday Open Thread

@TheLetterL Wow, thanks! I am getting some of those for stockings either way for sure.

Posted on December 21, 2013 at 9:40 am 1

By iceberg on Friday Open Thread

This week with the Bergy Bits:

The Diva already calls The Clown "Boy" - "Stop that, boy!" "Eat your breakfast, boy!" - but the other morning she literally stood on top of him. I may be raising a misandrist.

Dimples is pretty adamant that she wants to see the dinosaurs the next time we go to the zoo. I tried explaining "Honey, they don't have dinosaurs at the zoo", but she just glowered and shouted at me "I see dinosaurs at zoo!"

Bergy Bits vocab:
"It's too fit!" - it's too small and doesn't fit.
"It's too reach!" - It's too far away, I can't reach it.
"It's too stick!" - these French fries are unfit for toddler consumption.

This morning:

"Diva, do you need fresh socks? You wore those ones yesterday."

"Yeah! They stinky! And smell like poop. It's nasty!"

Posted on December 20, 2013 at 3:10 pm 10

By klemay on But How Feminist Is Your Dry Cleaning?

It's only a legitimate issue if you have your shit together enough to have your clothes dry-cleaned which... I do not.

Posted on December 17, 2013 at 11:51 am 3

By Rock and Roll Ken Doll on Friday Open Thread

@iceberg
The Nemoticon, a book containing the most hideous, occult emoticons imaginable!

Posted on December 13, 2013 at 3:24 pm 6

By iceberg on Friday Open Thread

This week with the Bergy Bits

"[Dimples], a face made out of letters is an emoticon."
"Nemoticon."
"Can you say 'emoticon'?"
"No I can't! ... I gotta go."

"Twinkle little stah
Have a what you ah
Up above so high
Like a diamond inna sky
Twinkle little stah
Have a what you ah"
-Diva

"Alouette" as sung by Dimples & Diva:
"ED-oo-wet, ED-oo-wet
Sonnez les mah-teen-uh, sonnez les mah-teen-uh
Ding dang dong, ding dang dong"

(come on, they know two French songs, that's pretty good!)

Dimples, advancing on The Clown, brandishing a large spoon: "I'm gonna CUT you!"

"[Clown], say "I'm a bossy boots!""
"I'm a bossy poop!"

Posted on December 13, 2013 at 3:06 pm 6

By iceberg on Friday Open Thread

The Diva, upon wearing a ruffled t-shirt and red plaid skirt:
[looks down at self]: "I'm a princess!"
[runs over to her brother] "Look!" [holds out skirt and dances a little bit to show it off]
[arrives at daycare, stands expectantly in front of teacher waiting for compliments]

She's going to be trouble.

We cut the feet out of the Diva's and the Clown's flannel footie PJs to make them last a bit longer, but Dimples (formerly known as the Quiet One) is having nnone of that and EVERY NIGHT as we put her footie PJs on she says "Don't cut them! Don't cut them!"

The Clown, my last holdout, has finally started potty training for real. He still has a lot of accidents if we don't remind him to go all the time, but he has volunteered "Mummy, I need to piss!" quite a few times as well, so we are making progress!

Next stop, getting rid of diapers at nap and night time.

Fuck I hate diapers.

Posted on December 6, 2013 at 3:08 pm 10

By Megasus on Cranksgiving

"Cooking wine" just means that as long as you're cooking, it's appropriate to drink it, right?

Also I consider pouring cereal to be cooking.

Posted on December 2, 2013 at 11:55 am 1

By Jinxie on Wednesday Open Thread

@iceberg Yeeeeaaaaaaaaaahhh ranch dressing shots!

Posted on November 27, 2013 at 5:44 pm 2