huh, maybe ask your doctor why compression socks are not good for you? they are pretty standard for people with DVT-risk, unless maybe there is something special about your case?
anyway, I just wanted to say that while some people do find them uncomfortable, for me they are amazingly comfortable and give me a sense of more energy (I guess because the blood circulates more)! The only annoying thing is putting them on in the first place -- but once they're on, my legs never get tired and I have energy all day! really worth trying for yourself (if medically permitted)!
Whoa, this is really scary. I feel these are the types of risks that doctors rarely take into account in their eagerness to prescribe birth control to everybody.
my own story: I had to go off birth control pills because of the blood clot risk (for a genetic risk factor -- Factor V Leiden), and it was my own decision (later confirmed by other doctors) because my GP never asked about/mentioned this kind of risk to me -- I found out that there was an added blood clot risk from the pill from friends. She also said, "you've been on the pill for x years and it's been okay, so why don't you just stay on it?" Yet one of my parents died from a pulmonary embolism and he's the one I inherited the Factor V Leiden. Why would I do that?
I also do all kinds of other things that increase the risk of blood clots, like frequent long-distance flying. I'd much rather not risk dying than learn how to use other forms of birth control (or even go ahead and get pregnant -- as a 30-something that would actually not be much of a disappointment if it happened, though we are not trying). Such a bummer that there was no conversation about it -- and that even pretty enlightened doctors often feel they "know best" when it comes to the supposed necessity of hormonal birth control.
(For the record, if anybody wants an alternative, diaphragms + spermicide work perfectly well, and are way cheaper, too!)
wait, what happened to the trash can?! ...amazingly wonderfully insane, thank you!
Right, well. It's a great idea to tell middle-class girls to learn to stick up for themselves. I wish everyone in America could be more comfortable with confrontation, and able to talk directly about uncomfortable things without assuming that said direct communication was A Big Deal and threatening to all concerned etc etc. I would love it if people could non-violently call out others on their bad behavior and get the others to stop or reconsider, and for both sides to feel like direct dialogue is an option.
Where Paglia goes way off the rails is her nastiness and her desire to blame other women who aren't just like her. There's nothing intrinsically wrong with being "nice." There are people, men and women, who aren't comfortable being "in your face" and they shouldn't have to be in order to be treated with basic human decency. You can have privilege in some ways and be treated horribly in others, at the same time -- these things don't rule one another out, and one doesn't make the other okay.
It's not women's responsibility to make (certain) men behave like decent non-heckling normal human beings in public. People, including men, are responsible for themselves.
Paglia herself doesn't seem deeply invested in the idea of treating other people with basic decency, dignity, and respect, so that is where a lot of us, men and women, fall off the bandwagon in wanting to read anything she's written. Her disrespect for others not like her comes dripping off the page. (Note: I am not a college girl or a blog-writing feminist, by any stretch of the imagination, but I still don't like being present when such people are spoken to disrespectfully).
There are other people you can read if you are tired of reading the same genre of critique all the time. Try Shulamith Firestone, or Mary Daly, if you want your socks knocked off.
he should get checked for sleep apnea. Snoring is actually quite not good, especially if he is under 40. Doctors can do various things to help.
secret fact: mashed turnips are actually quite good, especially if you mash some butter or milk or chives in there.
Where I live, we call it Small Business Saturday, which is not a very beautiful phrase, but it did remind me to go to my local independent wine-and-cheese store and buy a case of mixed bottles of wine for 20% off, which was delightful!
haha, this is just what I needed for Thanksgiving, Jim B.! thanks.
oh, barf. the best revenge is always living your own life really well and enjoying it, though, so in a way that is a good challenge/reminder to go out and do some of the things you've been meaning to for a long time, or learn a new skill. and have a fantastic cozy thanksgiving far away from him!
People have already responded with such thoughtful comments. Especially knocking the "I love him more every day" crock (it's ups and downs -- relationships grow cyclically too) and the difference between the fireworks of infatuation and the steady strength of long-term love.
I just wanted to add that, for me, real love, the type that is strong enough to get married on, is measured not so much by how passionate you *feel* subjectively (infatuation is notoriously deceptive in this regard) but rather what you'd be willing to do with and for him. as in: do you feel comfortable having him make life-and-death medical decisions for you if you're incapacitated, rather than a parent? could you open a shared bank account and feel good about it? the million-dollar question: can you trust him to be generous if something really awful happens to you and you need support? actions or potential actions that show you can trust each other -- those count a lot more than subjective fluttery feelings to me.