@Danzig! https://ncsfreedom.org/resources/kink-aware-professionals-directory/kap-directory-homepage.html may be a good place to start... kink-specific, but anyone listed here would definitely be sex-positive in their approach
@Danzig! But we have no indication that they didn't ever have that. I think a lot of the time those of us who are into the intense D/s say things like "we're 24/7!" as code for "well, we have a power dynamic most of the time but really, he only goes in the cage on weekends!" Being D/s all the time in your private life isn't the same as being high-protocol all the time.
My personal experience (not super extensive, but I'm in a relationship that I would describe as low-protocol 24/7 D/s) is that even though the power dynamic is always there it doesn't need to interfere with open communication. That power dynamic is never turned off, but there's nothing keeping me from speaking my mind most of the time. My opinion is usually along the lines of 'this is awesome can we do more?' but when it isn't he does listen. We are more informal about our kink than most other people I know who play with D/s (although I do have a cage. It was a birthday present and I'm very excited about it) but I don't think being two people who love each other and communicate openly is something that has to be separated from being two people in a D/s relationship.
@Danzig! not necessarily! I mean, people want what they want. It sounds like in reality they did end up with a lot of D/s in their private life. Which is okay if they're both cool with it...The way this is written does sound like he was more into it than she was, but that could in part be because it ended, and because the threesome was awful. She doesn't describe the BDSM itself as a problem at all, just that he wanted more of it than she did and that the threesome played out badly.
the thing about intense power exchange stuff is that it can be really hard to describe in a way that doesn't sound awful sometimes... power exchange can be intense and scary even when it's super satisfying and awesome as well.
bah, I reread this and feel inarticulate. But that letter gave me feelings.
@Blackwatch Plaid I don't think it's a covert smear campaign so much as young ladies are sometimes nervous about the whole 'sticking your fingers in your bloody vagina' thing.
Getting over that is why OB users are the easiest to talk into menstrual cups.
@fondue with cheddar you don't need to be smart about picking a husband! " You don’t marry someone because he’s your soul mate; he becomes your soul mate because you married him."
So you should have just picked some guy and it would have all worked out.
" You don’t marry someone because he’s your soul mate; he becomes your soul mate because you married him."
Holy shit, that's one of the worst pieces of advice I think I've ever seen.
@anachronistique I have even taken Wolf Hall out of the library more than once. It just ends up on the bottom of the pile, and then I can't renew it because other people want it and I sort of gave up.
Now it's going back on the hold list and third time's the charm.
Well now I need to read more Hilary Mantel! Quite aside from the content I am in love with how she uses words.
I want to start sending these to the significant other. Just one at a time, spaced out through the day. I predict 2 at the most before he realizes that these are not just spontaneous outbursts of oddly phrased lust.
I saw this headline on twitter and just knew it was going to be body-snatching or grave-digging or something else morbid and wonderful.
<3 The Hairpin.