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By Jia Tolentino on A Man in Ferguson Defends the Looting

@StLAmy but like if you want me to start making assumptions i've got QUITE A FEW

Posted on August 12, 2014 at 6:26 pm 2

By Jaya on Hockey Happened

I feel like you should get more points for hitting a goalpost. The odds seem harder!

Posted on February 20, 2014 at 4:30 pm 2

By Jolie Kerr on Impress Her With a Clean Bong

EMMAAAAAAA! Okay is this a safe space for me to share some OUTTAKES? I feel like it is. Here goes:

1. The Times writer was so lovely and so funny, and she told me that there were some things she absolutely wouldn't be able to get by her copy editor, which CRACKED ME UP. Among them were (obviously) The Jizzcliner but also skid marks. Which I get, because of the squick factor, but as I quite literally said to her, "Penelope, everybody poops. There's even a book about it!" So that was amusing.

2. The photographer who took my picture similarly reacted to some sort of naughty prints I have handing above my bed. "Oh, well those can't be in the photo. This is the Times!"

3. Apparently I'm so old that I still know what a bong is. The kids these days apparently don't. "They all use vaporizers." And then I wept for my aged self.

Hmmm what else? I'm sure there's more.

Posted on February 20, 2014 at 1:00 pm 6

By lunaesque on On the Brain-Dead Texas Woman Being Kept Alive to Gestate a Fetus

They're not even keeping the mother's body alive. They have a dead body in which they are circulating blood in a heretofore never before attempted experiment comparable to the kind of experiments on human life that took place in Germany during WWII (no, this is not an exaggeration). This is so disgustingly creepy, it makes my skin crawl. I feel for the family and the fetus, which does not have much of a chance of growing into a normal baby. The physicians involved in the "care" of this dead body should lose their liscences to practice medicine. They are professionals and know better. "First, do no harm."

Posted on January 8, 2014 at 11:59 am 7

By Story #2 on The Shark Has Pretty Teeth, Dear: Why I Teach Women Self-Defense

Yeah -- I guess you just have to train yourself to think, "I chose not to hurt the person who hurt me," not "I chose to let the person hurt me," which can feel like a pretty fine distinction. I move to open all self-defense courses with a brief crash course in ethical philosophy, I guess!

Posted on January 7, 2014 at 4:13 pm 4

By Jennifer Hargis@facebook on The Shark Has Pretty Teeth, Dear: Why I Teach Women Self-Defense

I would also like to say that there is a difference between "shouldn't have to" and "shouldn't".

Posted on January 7, 2014 at 1:49 pm 7

By mochi on What Your Favorite Holiday Cocktail Says About You

I'm working on a soundcloud playlist of EVERY SONG posted to Hairpin under the New Music tag. It is maddening work because songs sometimes mysteriously disappear from the list after they've been added. But no matter I shall press on! Once it's finished I'll share the link. Merry Christmas

Posted on December 13, 2013 at 11:38 am 5

By 113059168@twitter on Get This Kay Jewelers Commercial Out My Face

@stroopwafel You obviously didn't get the deeper meaning... Jane Seymour -> butt jewelry -> -> ->

SEYMOUR BUTTS

They want everyone to Seymour Butts. That's the only way I can find this even remotely less horrifying.

Posted on December 9, 2013 at 9:57 pm 3

By OhMyGoshYouGuys on Get This Kay Jewelers Commercial Out My Face

@Better to Eat You With She doesn't need to talk.
This ad should be referred to as "The Cabin in the Woods" commercial.

Posted on December 9, 2013 at 2:28 pm 3

By j-i-a on Get This Kay Jewelers Commercial Out My Face

@latenac omg i would so much rather the guy give a diamond collar to the dog/cat because the dog/cat cannot be indoctrinated into the disgusting system of trading diamonds for unquestioned loyalty

Posted on December 9, 2013 at 10:49 am 6