So...you were a female Niles Crane?
@sycofan Thanks for all of your responses :-)
Serious question here - how do people make friends? I struggle with it a lot. I grew up in a crazy, dysfunctional house and then spent all my 20s in addiction myself. I had friends throughout that time but I gravitated towards people who reinforced how shitty I felt about myself. Now I'm over a year sober, go to AA, spent a lot of time in therapy but I still struggle with finding friends. I worry that the type of close friendship I want isn't possible when you get to know each other in your early 30s. Like, it's only possible if you've known each other since you were 4 years old. Does anyone have any advice on how to make close friends when you're older?
These videos are getting better and better. Also, what the hell, Cover Girl? What the hell is up with that marketing campaign? Seriously, could you scrape the barrel any further?
Unrelated, kinda (well, we're talking about makeup), can someone recommend decent eyeliner tutorials for a 32 year old with the makeup skills of a toddler?
Lovely to hear your story. Congrats on your sobriety. I turned a year sober last month. I'm not as brave as you about sharing it on social media but I do dislike all the stigma surrounding addiction and mental health. I hope one day I can be as open as you.
@mrstruscott Any chance of you coming to Ireland?
I read Jez from the beginning. Like others have said, I used to really love it. There was a commenter at the beginning, whose name I can't remember. She had an avatar of a panda and I think her name involved a panda in it. Anyway, she wrote a post with another woman about using their boyfriend's semen as a facial and it always stuck with me for some reason.
Weirdly, I felt part of something in those early days of Jez. I used to read it all day and just click refresh. I was definitely obsessed.
I really enjoyed Jessica Coen as the editor of Gawker but I don't love Jez under her control. Things change I suppose. Gawker was great fun back in the early days. I was living in New York, working in media and enjoying the shit out of reading all the bitchy gossip about New York media. When they introduced commenting first, I was too scared to ever comment because everyone who did was just so fucking smart.
I wish Jez all the best with the new book. I feel I owe the staff a night out for all the boring days of work drudgery that they got me through.
@mirah Yeah, this used to be my internet "safe place" but the comments on this piece are just vicious. Also, 22 is so fucking young. I doubt very much I appreciated the opportunities I had at 22. It's something I can only really appreciate in hindsight.
I am sorry to hear about the above commenter's partner dying. I can't imagine going through something like that at such a young age. But we all have different life experiences and we handle them the best way we can. As someone else pointed out, it's not the suffering olympics.
Great post. Also, this comment made me feel a tad ashamed of myself:
"Well, I think it’s given me a baseline of empathy for people who are outside of the norm or popular understanding."
I have a difficult upbringing for other reasons and have a tendency to think that I had The Worst Childhood Ever and everyone else has a perfect life. I could definitely have a bit more empathy for other people.
No 1 could have been lifted straight from that Jay McInerney book that was based on Rielle Hunter (I think?). Anyway, after reading a few of those, I don't know if I feel better that I haven't had sex for a year or worse.