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On Imagining Grown-Ass Eloise

What an awful, snarky article. I really hope the writer hasn't read any of those works since she actually was a kid, because her interpretations are so far off.

Let me just say, that growing up in my family's tiny, thin-walled, centipede-infested walkup, the adventures of Eloise--who had free reign of a fancy hotel, didn't have chores or go to school, and got to jet off to fabulous places like Paris, and never had to fall asleep listening to her parents fight about money down the hall--were a wonderful escape. Excuse me for a being a sad kid with fantasies. (Honestly, Eloise was what I graduated to when I got a little old for princesses and magic.) I also am pretty sure she's intended to come off as bratty and entitled, at least to adults. Like, I am 100% positive that at no point was Kay Thompson like "yes, I have just created the best, most inclusive role model!"

Also, you don't get throw around words like classism and then go on to reduce the central issue of To Kill a Mockingbird to fucking boredom. That's right, folks, the whole court case Scout's father gets involved in is just a red herring!

Posted on October 24, 2013 at 1:50 am 11

On Rihanna On My Mind: Chatting About the "Pour It Up" Video

@iceberg Yeah, I was lolling pretty hard at the "no men" part. Just because you don't see a man *in front* of the camera doesn't mean he's not there.

And it's always nice to see we can't talk about how great one woman is without putting other women down. Like, idk, radio has 24 hours to kill and my generations-old iPod has 30gig, maybe we can have multiple female pop stars? Who do things differently because they're different people?

Posted on October 4, 2013 at 7:57 pm 5

On Spend Three Days Living Like a Seattle Homeless Person for the Low, Low Price of $2000

Maybe Seattle is different than just about every other major American city, but usually the number of available beds at shelters is way less than the number of homeless people in need of those beds. Like, I hope all $2000 dollars goes to the shelter they stay at, to make up for having some idiot with too much money take up an all-too-limited resource that people actually need. And maybe they can call off the shelter sleepover if there's any kind of inclement weather.

Posted on October 2, 2013 at 11:30 pm 0

On The Cheap Wine Report

Man, I would hope the dude with a Wino Forever tattoo would pick decent wine.

Posted on August 15, 2013 at 11:25 pm 0

On The Cheap Wine Report

@titsgrande okay, but what's the Gretzky wine gonna cost? I am concerned based on what I just learned about Canadian wine pricing upthread.

Posted on August 15, 2013 at 11:21 pm 0

On 10 Scariest Excerpts from "The Opt-Out Generation Wants Back In"

@large__marge serious-fucking-lee. But I suppose talking about intersectionality might make people uncomfortable, and we can't do that to people who identify as liberals/feminists, oh no!

Posted on August 7, 2013 at 1:38 pm 7

On 10 Scariest Excerpts from "The Opt-Out Generation Wants Back In"

You don't understand. I coulda had class. I coulda been an astronaut. I coulda been somebody, instead of a mum, which is what I am, let's face it. It was you, Charley.

Posted on August 7, 2013 at 1:36 pm 21

On 10 Scariest Excerpts from "The Opt-Out Generation Wants Back In"

@hallelujah I'm pretty sure the biggest downside to my mom having a life outside of raising me is that I could get really obnoxious bragging about how awesome my mom was. On the upside, I was definitely the only kid in my second grade class who could offer any explanation of what "amjure" meant.

Posted on August 7, 2013 at 1:25 pm 1

On 10 Scariest Excerpts from "The Opt-Out Generation Wants Back In"

@stonefruit He has the truly hard job of looking adorable at all times.

Posted on August 7, 2013 at 1:18 pm 11

On 10 Scariest Excerpts from "The Opt-Out Generation Wants Back In"

@JessicaLovejoy All the really rich people bought Teslas and don't use gas anymore. Duh. And your antique car can be filled up by the help in their neighborhood.

(I live a block from a gas station and also like the ready access to late-night junk food, but I'm a plebe.)

Posted on August 7, 2013 at 1:09 pm 1