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On "Cheap Sunglasses, Expensive Lingerie"

@bitzyboozer I have been biased against expensive lipstick ever since I got a free sample of some higher-end stuff at Sephora and it was the exact color of my actual lips. Like it could have been invisible. The no-makup makeup look? I was sort of flattered my actual lip color is apparently nice enough to make into a lipstick but also felt weirdly ripped off by a free sample. I got all excited for nice lipstick that you can't even tell I'm wearing!

Posted on March 31, 2015 at 4:13 am 0

On "Cheap Sunglasses, Expensive Lingerie"

@Katie M. Cheap sunglasses are truly one of the only reasons I've considered contacts.

Posted on March 31, 2015 at 4:06 am 0

On "Cheap Sunglasses, Expensive Lingerie"

@moldy goldie But dogs are colorblind! They can't match colors either!

(the only opinion my dog has on his collar is "you're putting my collar on! I AM GOING OUTSIDE YAY!!")

Posted on March 31, 2015 at 4:04 am 0

On What Should I Name My Plant?

Oh man, I like plants in theory but I am terrible with them. I may have a brown thumb. The best I can do is water other people's plants when they go out of town, and even then I need specific instructions. (But I am really good with cats and dogs? But they tell when they need stuff! Like, I feed my cat breakfast and dinner right on schedule and there are many times in-between where he makes sure I know his fat ass is TOTALLY STARVING.)

In college (when I could not have any pets in the dorm) I had a venus flytrap who lived for about two years. His (her? Idk with plants) name was Audrey. My roommate and I sang "Feed Me Seymour" to Audrey when we got bored, because we were cool like that.

Posted on March 26, 2015 at 6:03 am 0

On Hysteria and Teenage Girls

@AllisonWonderland At least when the Stones first started, they also had the androgyny thing going (with hair even longer than the Beatles').

Posted on March 17, 2015 at 1:24 am 0

On The Best Time I Got Sent to "Pray-Away-the-Gay" Bible Yoga Camp

Posted on November 13, 2014 at 12:18 am 0

On How We Eat

@Onymous Yeah, exactly. Eggs benedict seems plenty creative to me. I think the only non-creativity in American breakfasts stems from how many of us skip it.

Posted on October 10, 2014 at 4:19 am 0

On Annotated Rainbow Brite Fan Fiction

Hey, I also dictated Rainbow Brite fan fiction to my babysitter! I couldn't remember Murky and Lurky's names, so I just called them "the bad guy" and "the other one."

My babysitter was a great editor. She pointed out when I had called both bad guys "the other one." She also didn't say anything like "My Little Ponies are a totally different show!" when I decided they needed to show up. (To younger me, the only thing keeping Starlite from being a pony was that he was too tall and the star was on his forehead, not his butt.)

Posted on September 18, 2014 at 3:04 pm 1

On Ask Baba Yaga: How Do I Commit to the Life I Have Instead of the Life I Could Have?

It is the same life.
Exactly! You're still you, your past is still there, you're just in a different place (and cut off from the social circle you did have*). It's hard to get better just by running away from your problems.

*I am sure among everyone you've ever known are people who do care about you and like you even with your current problems (they have problems too!). They'd miss you.

Posted on September 11, 2014 at 3:44 pm 0

On No Excuses: Responding To One-Handed Reviews

@CaitlinRenee LOL. "Don't take it personally even though that's what I'm doing!"

PS- tldr

Posted on September 5, 2014 at 7:52 pm 1