@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose I tried not to give her flack (since I knew there would be plenty) -- I was mostly confused because her letter doesn't make it clear if she wants someone to date or someone to sleep with. I kind of get that it's hard not to hook up with someone you're into who doesn't seem to care about their marriage vows, and I also suspect it's one of those things you won't thoroughly know is a bad idea unless you've done it and had it end badly. (Which I suppose it might not!) The commenters are more upset, I think, at the judgmental value tone that comes across with the "can only sleep with successful men, all successful men are married, ergo must sleep with married men" theorem. Though I think unpacking the notion of male success and why we're conditioned to look for that in order to find someone attractive would be more useful.
LW1, have you met a guy named Bob recently?