Gluecakes! Better than the alternative.

On The Things We Hide

@Jinxie I once hooked up with an older dude and got my period in the middle of the night. When I asked about finding a bodega, apparently he had a box of them for the convenience of his friends. I loved the idea and immediately installed a box of tampons into the bathroom of my favourite guy. He wasn't all "you forgot your tampons" but instead kept it safe for me and claimed winner status.

Posted on September 24, 2013 at 12:04 am 3

On How Many Words Could You Read Aloud While Climaxing?

@iceberg No, they're not. You can find all of them on www.hystericalliterature.com - It also includes essays written by the women who have done videos as well as other writers about the project and Clayton's thoughts on the project entirely.

Disclosure - I've filmed one of these videos with him, though mine is not released yet. I'm not a porn actress, just an artist who believed in the project and thought it'd be fun and a thought-provoking experience (which it was). Also, friend of Clayton, fwiw.

Posted on September 16, 2013 at 2:09 am 0

On When Trash Attacks

@SwissMeringue As it expands with garbage, it traps air between the bag & the bin and it forms a vacuum seal! It helps to jiggle it around to break that seal, then it should come right out. This happens to me every time I let the bin get overstuffed and yet I still find it unacceptable to take it out until there there is an overflowing mound that topples every time I open the fridge door.

Posted on August 2, 2013 at 2:18 pm 1

On 11 Summers Away

I'm at Junior year and I'm a woman and I'm currently horrified at what these girls got up to. Pooping on someone's bed? Pulling out someone else's tampon? Gahhhhhhhh I'm so glad I had no friends now.

Posted on July 24, 2013 at 6:34 pm 1

On In the Future, All Streetlights Will Be Glow-in-the-Dark Trees

This was totally on Kickstarter and yes, I totally backed it and someday will receive seeds to grow my own little glowy plants. I'm excited!

Posted on July 23, 2013 at 2:23 am 0

On "What's the Worst Thing That's Woken You Up in the Dead of Night?"

Always late to the party buuuuut... in college I was on spring break and working on my thesis for art school. I was in the midst of a work bender, which involved copious alcohol, energy drinks and no sleep. Also, since I wasn't leaving the house, I wore almost no clothes.
At one point I was awake for my fourth day in a row and decided to take a nap for a couple hours. I'd just started drifting off when I felt a tickle on my back. I thought it shifted a little, thinking it was something random stuck to me when i flopped from lying on my back to onto my stomach since my bed was filled with random coins, cellophane, pencils, etc and then I noticed that it moved course to stay on my back. I freaked out and jumped straight out of the bed and saw this huge fucking cockroach fall onto its back on the floor. After it was skittering all over my naked body.

Suffice to say, I emptied half a can of country fresh scented roach spray and then proceeded to not sleep for the remained of my thesis. I got sleep on day five or six after I finally cleaned my fucking bed.

Posted on June 12, 2013 at 10:28 pm 1

On The Least Appealing Foods I’ve Eaten in Eight Years of Travel Writing

@bonymaroni in NYC, there was a delicious ice cream store that sold it as a sorbet. It was AMAZING! I likened it to an acid trip in my mouth - it tasted like all the flavours and then ended on a sort of meaty/savoury note. I loved it & I just discovered a fruit market up the street from me sells it so I wanna try to make my own durian sorbet. Mmmff

Posted on May 6, 2013 at 6:42 pm 1

On Friday Open Thread

@ellochka Grab a tablespoon & dip 1/2 into a jar of honey, fill the other half with lemon juice, sprinkle cayenne pepper liberally on top. Try to swallow quickly, but not too quickly so it can coat yer throat a bit. It won't be very pleasant, but it should get things moving along. It is also weirdly relieving if you also have a sore throat.

I also ate the super spicy ramen bowls from my local bodega (mmm, spicy pollo ramen!) and would drop an egg in the hot water while I let it cook for the additional protein. The steam/spice got some things moving along.

If you are desperate (like, seriously, you would cut off a limb if it made it stop), and not allergic to peppers, you can also snort the teeny tiniest amount (like, less than a coke nail) of cayenne pepper in each nostril. It will hurt like a motherfucker and you will run around screaming wondering why you did this until all of the sudden the entire contents of your sinus dumps out and then the cayenne also numbs the burning/swelling so for the next hour you have sweet blessed relief. Then take every medicine you can to get to sleep so you aren't conscious when it comes back.

...I used to work a shit freelance job that gave me a sinus infection if I was called in too many days per week because they never cleaned their a/c filters (as it was pulling air in from a dusty warehouse, not the outside wtf). I couldn't even afford my copay so, y'know, desperate times leads to desperate googling for home remedies.

Posted on March 24, 2013 at 5:13 am 1

On Friday Open Thread

Posted on March 24, 2013 at 5:13 am 0

On And the Winner of the 2013 Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show Is...

Ughhhhh... I found a pigeon available for adoption. I love pigeons so hard - I used to have a baby that a coworker found on the streets, kicked out of its nest. My apartment is too small for a proper cage though and I live with a jerk cat that would try to hurt it. But also, I can't imagine people in NYC wanting to do adopt a pigeon because a lot of people think they're gross.

I wanna save you and give you a hoooooome, pigeon!

Posted on February 13, 2013 at 6:06 pm 1