Your 2012 Baby Name Guide: Baseball Edition

1. Chub Sullivan READ MORE

Name That Love Letter

A. Dearest Angel Girl: … I suppose most of us are lonely in this big world, but we must fall tremendously in love to find it out. The cure is the discovery of our need for company — I mean company in the very special sense we’ve come to understand since we happened to each other — you and I. The pleasures of human experience are emptied away without that companionship — now that I’ve known it; without it joy is just an unendurable as sorrow. You are my life — my very life. Never imagine your hope approximates what you are to me. Beautiful, precious little baby — hurry up the sun! — make the days shorter till we meet. I love you, that’s all there is to it. READ MORE

Name That Bride, Part Two

A. “A strapless Vera Wang gown and flip-flops.” READ MORE

Centers of Gravity: In Conversation With an Ex-Gymnast

Chelsea Bieker will not be going to London this year. A forme competitive gymnast and current coach, she’ll be spending the summer teaching freshman composition classes at Portland State University, where she finished her MFA in fiction earlier this year. Though Chelsea currently spends most of her time grading papers and writing short fiction about murderers, barflies, teenage prostitutes, and the good people of Fresno, California (her hometown), gymnastics still has a place in her heart, and she was kind enough to share her thoughts and memories with me over a few YouTube videos. READ MORE

What We Will Be Playing in the London Games

Now that we’ve looked at the sports we won’t be able to watch this summer (pigeon racing, you will be missed), let’s take a look at the sports we will get to see. I’ve attempted to find as many reasons as I can for why each one should be capable of capturing our hearts, and only one of them is penis-related. READ MORE

What We Won't Be Playing in the London Games

Some sports are all but synonymous with the Olympics. Gymnastics, which is nearly impossible to find on TV in the periods between Games, is suddenly everywhere during them — the same goes for figure skating during the Winter Games, as Norm Macdonald so memorably opined in the aftermath of the Kerrigan attack. (“I think it’s time that we come together as a society, and make it clear that we’re not gonna tolerate thugs solving their problems with violence, and we’re not gonna tolerate TV executives making us watch hours and hours of figure skating, when there are good hockey games not even being televised.") Gymnastics may be so popular because they are guaranteed to provide at least one great Olympic moment, and the same applies to swimming, diving, and the various events clustered under the remarkably uninformative umbrella title of “Athletics”: marathon, pole vault, long jump, the 100 meter dash, and others. READ MORE

"Only You, Mary Lou": In Search of the Olympic Moment

The London Olympics are less than three weeks away, so naturally I’ve already started fighting with people about them. The other day I got into an argument with a friend when I began elaborating on how much I was looking forward to the Games (I had bought my commemorative Mary Lou Retton Wheaties box! I was already obsessing about the trials!) and he said that he wouldn’t be watching them because they were, in his opinion, “dull.” Even more annoying than that, however, was the fact that, the more I thought about it, the more I could see his point. READ MORE

Unusual Miss America Talents

1949: Water ballet (Patricia Cunningham, IN). READ MORE

Your 2012 Baby Name Guide: Miss America Contestant Edition

1. China Helmandolllar READ MORE

Name That Bride

A. “A suit of midnight blue with a matching hat trimmed with leather ribbons and buckles [and] a bouquet of orchids and small white flowers.” READ MORE