oatmealshrapnel
I play the piano. I frolic and bumble and weave great caterpillars of bullshit. http://www.youtube.com/user/oatmealshrapnel
On "You got a couple of 'em!"
@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas I know, I'm amazed by her. Because, as an asian who's also spent her whole life trying to avoid disgusting white men who fetishize them, I would have ran screaming away. God, she has balls.
3
On Quirks: Is Their Ignorance Our Bliss?
@Dancersize I say "yellow!" all the time! i think of it as going back to my chinese roots
1
On Gifts, Brolessness, and More Grad School From the Underworld
I just love this line:
"I'm familiar with the phenomenon of girls being friends with mostly guys because they "just don't get along with other girls," which essentially means they're a little crazy and enjoy tormenting the meek boys who are secretly in love with them"
I do have to add though, that I do know guys who exclusively have all girl friends. notably, my last ex-bf. only PRETTY girls too. That he had feelings for at certain times before. Wait, am I this letter writer from the future?
1
On [Discount] Valentine's Day Basket
I "hung out" with my ex, ate pizza, got massages, and then had sex. But I feel poop-y now. And no, I have never once gotten flowers for V-day. I'm always too much of a casual sex buddy. And this is why I get just a wee bit annoyed when people talk about how "freaked out" they get when their boy/whatever gets them nice bouquets and such.
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On “Marriage can contain everything. Marriage can contain everything.”
my childish (and probably envious) need to make fun of pretention doesn't know what to say to this article. it was actually pretty good! i like dance metaphors.
but i read the link to the ridiculous wedding. geezus! a dinner consisting only of dumplings and popcorn! that's so depressing! and annoying! but i guess innovative.
1
On Wishes
i love the last answer. i love it when they turn it around to be about the interviewer.
oh, and carrie and verdie...were they asked mid-fight or something?
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On The Piano Lesson
I'm bookmarking this story because I've been a piano teacher for 11 years and would like to steal the line of:
"Promise me you’ll start taking this seriously. This instrument is my whole life. Imagine building a house with your bare hands, and then watching your kids put holes in the wall.”
Crunchette
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On "Before You Die, You See"
The Ring (japanese version) freaked me out for a solid 2 years. Once, I was all alone at home (very young, still in high school!), and as I was walking up the stairs to bed at 2 am, the tv FUCKING TURNED ON. JUST LIKE IN THE FUCKING MOVIE. My heart's still there on the stairs, where it popped out.
Oh, I remember watching the Ring 2 while extremely high, because somehow my friend had convinced me that it would make the movie HILARIOUS instead of scary. No. Did not work.
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On How to Bring Your Lunch to Work: A Guide
@julia So true. My university has a Panda Express and a Quiznos. Not great options at all. This is what I get from moving from NY to the Midwest.