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Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

I love writing but I'm bad at writing about me.

On Weekend Roundup / Open Thread

@Jazmine Hughes ah, yes. Depending on where you're from you might call it a garbanzo bean?

Posted on February 21, 2015 at 11:13 pm 0

On Weekend Roundup / Open Thread

Jazmine, did you see Jack McBrayer on Conan? I know it was just two white guys talking, whatever, but apparently Jack McBrayer eats chickpeas right out of the can. I thought you'd need to know.

Posted on February 20, 2015 at 5:34 pm 0

On Weekend Roundup / Open Thread

@Meaghan M Kelley Apparently there are people who don't like beans, and thus they do not believe in chili that contains beans. I used to be friends with one of these people. We are no longer friends.

Posted on February 20, 2015 at 5:22 pm 0

On What's the Best Time Your Family Has Ever Trolled You?

My grandfather was THE BEST at trolling. He would have eel on certain holidays (Christmas Eve and the feast of St. Joseph, I think), and obviously the eels were always bought fresh. By "fresh" I mean "still alive." We were pretty squeamish as kids and would get grossed out by the sight of my grandfather's eels slithering around in a basin in the sink, awaiting their fate. (Eels are freaky, okay?) So we would try to avoid looking at them at all costs, and my grandfather managed to trick us into looking at them every damn time. "Come downstairs, I have to show you something. It's not an eel." BUT IT WAS.
We also do a gift exchange at Christmas (like a white elephant but the presents are only unwrapped at the end of the game.) There was at least one prank gift every year, courtesy of my grandparents' storage room - a can of chickpeas or a really gnarly old carrot.

Oh and my sister and I troll each other by sneaking pictures back and forth - it started with an episode of Gilmore Girls where Rory and Lorelai are horrified by a picture of someone's ugly baby, and then one of them sneaks the ugly baby picture onto the other's pillow. We've done this back and forth with pictures of famous people for over 10 years now - and I think it's high time for me to bring back that picture of NHL player Mason Raymond holding a puppy. It's been snuck into Christmas and birthday gifts and has been lying in wait for long enough now. Time to pounce.

Posted on February 18, 2015 at 12:27 pm 2

On Who's the Most Important Person in Your Life?

@peppercornelius Are you too young, maybe? I'm 27, so not that much older, but I have a friend who's a professor (I forget he teaches undergrad or masters students) and many of his students had never heard of gchat. So maybe it's a slightly-older-people thing.

Posted on February 13, 2015 at 5:14 pm 0

On South Central Does It Like Nobody Does

I love this song so much, I don't even think you all even understand. I wish I had it on a cassette tape.

Posted on February 12, 2015 at 5:22 pm 0

On Deep Thoughts

I once went on a friend-date with a girl who had unknowingly(?) dated my very recent ex. It was awkward and also she was... a very specific kind of person, so yeah, that friendship didn't stick. Better off as Twitter follows and acquaintances.

Posted on February 11, 2015 at 11:30 am 1

On Open Thread / Weekend Roundup

@Ilana Masad@facebook Racist jail, as in jail for racists?

Isn't that just getting a job at Fox News?

Posted on February 9, 2015 at 12:24 pm 1

On Open Thread / Weekend Roundup

Jazmine, I loved that white people jokes piece, and my accomplishments this week* pale in comparison.

*I found out how many degrees of separation I am from Chris Evans and Beyoncé.

Posted on February 6, 2015 at 5:05 pm 2

On Bruce Jenner May Change the Game

THIS!! Especially the part about his pronouns. That's the biggest reason why I hope he makes an official statement about this soon - so that we all know which pronouns to use, and so that at least some people will learn more about transpeople and how damaging it can be to use the wrong pronouns.

Posted on February 6, 2015 at 12:10 pm 0