I loved this essay and it made me laugh out loud, it's the kind of thing I love about the Hairpin. Maybe because I am from LA and live in Northern California? Maybe because this kind of internal dialogue reminds me of my own internal dialogue? I've loved the Hairpin since the Edith days, and it's still a pleasure every day.
Ok, this made me laugh so hard I spilled my tea. I can't explain why, but giggles in abundance. ALL the Drake posts crack me up.
I didn't grow up with maids/housecleaners but I did grow up with an obsessively clean mother who also forced me to clean. I love when things are clean but I hate cleaning so much that it makes me rageful, so yes, I recognize the rage. Cleaning, cleaning the "right" way gives me the rage.
The best/worst guy is putting himself through college as a handyman, is broad and muscled and the only blond guy you ever thought was sexy. He smells like old spice and tells you, after you put your hand in his pocket to retrieve his lighter that he never wears underwear. It’s the nineties, and he has a goatee, and in the current day you love that beards are back. He changes your oil, carries your books, helps you move, joins a student protest movement and helps you take over a campus building, even though before he met you he never even voted. Until him, you never understood the carnal nature of desire, the obsession with sex, and what it means to truly want someone in that way. He fixes his sleepy eyes on you, calls you first thing in the morning and last thing at night, kisses you every time you lean over to put on your seatbelt, takes to you a park with waterfalls, asks you to marry him but to wait a few years, explains that he can date other people to get it out of his system but you are the only person he loves, and doesn't want you to date anyone because someone else might fall in love with you, then dates your former best friend in secret. When you ask him what they talked about, he says "you," and offers to dump her if you come back to him.
Oh 1/4/13 Married Dude! Is it possible for you write a post about how your parents getting divorced when you were 4 didn't ruin your whole life? My husband just left me and our 4 year old son, and while I am devastated, it probably will be the best thing in the long run. But I am tormented by the impact it is having/while have on my son.
HI Jane, thanks so much for posting these, I know it must be super weird that strangers want to look at pictures that document such a personal experience. I really enjoy reading the Hairpin, i think it's a great webmag, and I am very happy for your joy! Congrats.
@madge If I don't have lines to write on my writing looks drunk.
keep writing things that assume that readers are smart! ALSO: I am sure it is very time-consuming, but I love the illustrated movie reviews. They make me laugh out loud and I force my loved ones to read them. More of those would be great. Also the clean person. They are my inspiration. Maybe more book reviews? I love hairpin, and hairpin commentators, or commenters, whichever is correct.
@Where'sWalden? I made all my friends chug beer from really cheap baby bottles from the dollar store. Fastest one wins. It was super funny. Also, anagrams from the parent names. Most words win.
wednesday greatness. Lisa Hanawalt is fantastic, her drawings and sense of humor sublime! Also sublime, the comments!! chonies, the gross+awesome=dog stories. This story made my day! I may actually finish my workday instead of fleeing into the streets.