On A Poem That I Can Also Say In Dutch Based on Phrases I Learned In Duolingo

being able to use my OK Dutch skills happens rarely but this is one of them! "hallo, schonen" would actually be "hello, beauties". "Schoon" is clean (shonen is literally clean ones, kind of), "schoen" is shoe (almost spelled the same) so you'd want "Hallo, schoenen" went greeting your hallway in the morning.

Posted on April 1, 2015 at 3:16 am 0

On How We Eat

Little Viv in Amsterdam is doing it wrong because what you want to do is put proper peanut butter on instead of regular butter and then pure vlokken or hagelsag (the chocolate vlokken are flakes and pretty big, hagelslag is sprinkles) on top. On proper, fresh brown bread it is absolute heaven and one of the few things that will make my dad revert entirely into a Dutch man (no PB though, salted butter only).

And a glass of milk, because that is why we are so tall. If you're really Dutch you might have bread, butter, cheese and a glass of karnemelk (buttermilk) - literally the lunch of 70% of the people at work. (Saw a Dutchly skinny man eat 6 slices of bread and cheese and half a litre of karnemelk today.)

Posted on October 14, 2014 at 1:48 pm 0

On The Return of the Measles

Oh my days. My kids (when/if they arrive) will be jabbed with all the vaccinating needles. And if, for some horrible allergic reason, they can't I will have to seriously consider moving to Mississippi, or West Virginia.

Even after having the full vaccination regime I still got whooping cough and it was the most horrible, painful awful thing I've experienced to date. There are few side effects that would counter seeing someone I love go through that. The most upsetting to me are the parents that don't want them bc the needle jab itself upsets the baby. I've seen kids run full pelt into a table get knocked down and stand back up smiling if the people around them stay calm. My personal experience says running into shit is way, WAY, more painful than a vaccination, so what gives.

Posted on July 3, 2014 at 5:39 am 0

On A Reasonable Review of One Direction's New Album, Which Is the Best Album Ever

@zamboni Carrots for the reindeer anda drop of sherry for santa himself! If you're feeling generous you can leave him a mince pie too. Or, you know, leftovers because you ate the carrots and mince pies for dinner. And sometimes Santa gets milk bc he's working on his teeth, or coke bc he has to stay up all night. You get it. It's treats to bribe him for pressies.

Posted on November 27, 2013 at 3:28 am 0

On What Do You Wear Around the House?

Posted on January 15, 2013 at 3:55 pm 0

On Q&A With a Nutritionist, Part One: Eat

@highjump I realise not everyone has this experience but my life was changed by a crazy yoga lady. While I was working and my hayfever hit (seriously, it went from nothing to atchoo in about 3 hrs) she suggested I stop eating wheat. I thought it was total BS but weighed the pros and cons and knew that even if it didn't work I'd already be miserable from the sneezing/wheezing/snotting all summer so maybe no bread would be OK. Long story short, I stopped eating wheat, I stopped sneezing - I was happy. I did try re-introducing wheat later (pasta! bread! cakes!) and it was truly unpleasant, gas, return of the eczema, massive bloated belly.

So, keep your eyed for a crazy yoga woman glistening with sweat of a recent bikram workout? Or just approach it sensibly, with the help of a dietician, and try exclusion diets. Allergies are weird things, often you don't realise how much they effect you.

Posted on October 17, 2012 at 11:54 am 3

On Servicio Técnico

@AMS Just keep speaking Dutch to whoever is being a prat about only speaking English. My English and Dutch are equally good (unless you start talking to me about Eastern philosophy, or something, in Dutch) and working in a cafe I realised I did the switch to English thing far too quickly. But as soon as the second attempt at Dutch communication was made I switched right back to English. It's really kickass you're all making the effort though, my mum's been with a Dutchman for 25 and lived in NL for 15 and I've never hear her (have to) speak Dutch.

Zo, zeg. Wat zijn er veel 'pinners in Nederland. Als er iemand in Den Haag is die wil oefenen ben ik volgende week de hele week VRIJ!

Posted on October 17, 2012 at 4:20 am 3

On The League of Ordinary Ladies: Waterfalls

@pekoe it is exactly like trying to take a picture out of a moving car. Just as frustrating and jarring but once I randomly stuck my camera out of the window and pushed the button. When I checked a moment later there was a focussed, melancholy donkey centred perfectly in the frame. So, maybe, sometimes, it could be a good thing? But there were also 43294785 pictures of blurry tomatoes and smudgy fields from that car trip, so yeah.

Posted on October 16, 2012 at 5:00 am 2

On Fullkommen Björk

@Jane Marie Phew, thought I was going crazy. Or I was doing that thing when I didn't fully realise it was in a different language until I'd already replied in the wrong language and sounded silly, or something. Also, Dutch doesn't happen that often.

Posted on October 5, 2012 at 6:03 am 0

On Fullkommen Björk

I am very excited by this! I was wondering, though. Is that site in Dutch for anyone else? It could just be a weird google translate-fu thing with me being in NL. So, is it?

Posted on October 4, 2012 at 7:02 pm 0