I would like Ellie Shechet, 23, to please become my new best friend.
I'm so glad to see other people did this as well. I would write short stories, with illustrations, about a girl named Tanya (the most beautiful name I could think of) who wore splatter-paint t-shirts and was allowed to wear the shiny black bike shorts I coveted. Her hair was also permed. Tanya liked to ride her bike and talk on her "car phone" at the same time. That's pretty much where I lost interest.
"FILL MY STOCKING WITH A DUPLEX"?!?
Might this mean she wants TWO Santas to hurry down the chimney?
The Nemoticon, a book containing the most hideous, occult emoticons imaginable!
By dtowngirl on Pass the Cranberry Chodes: Christmas, According to a December 1951 Copy of Woman's Day
The Cranberry Come-On is a come-on that might just work on me.
Reading Between the Texts is hands down my favorite thing to ever exist on the Internet. Happy birthday, Katie Heaney, and thank you for your texting wisdom which is hilarious and on point as always!
I don't think I've ever been with a guy with a REALLY big dick (probably for the best?), but I did once sleep with a guy with huge balls. Just enormous. He said a worried gf once made him go to the doctor, who told him he was fine, but "in the 99th percentile". So if you want to do a follow up interview, I know a guy.
@mollpants Dude, the first time I encountered a big dick--and not even like, porn star big, just bigger than average--I was like "Let's measure it! I'll get my sewing tape!" I can't believe no one's measured this guy's.
@Better to Eat You With That's...a pretty aggressive nickname, not gonna lie.
@Blushingflwr You presume too much